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LIVE your life (blog marathon post 3)




In my last book there was a chapter called 'Radiators and Drains' (which was about people in your life falling into one of these two categories) which became really popular. In a nutshell (for those who haven't read my book) , it was about how someone in your life makes you feel so very good about yourself without false praise and who brighten up the world just by their presence  (these are the radiators) and the opposites of these are Drains.

I have been getting a lot of mails about that, asking if grumbling about something or being upset about something makes one a 'drain'. NO! Definitely not!

It is impossible for anyone to feel peppy, happy and enthusiastic all the time. It is only natural to get a few knocks in life. If you haven't got a few knocks it means you are living in a safe zone and you need to really do things.

By knocks, I mean set-backs, rejections, disappointments and things not going the way you want them to. We all face them from time to time. It is only natural to want to moan a bit. But moaning all the time? That is what makes one a drain. Drains also are the ones who will find that little black dot and gleefully gloat over it.  They are the prickers , the 'put-downers'. (Click on the links if you want a detailed explanation)

We all know  people like that who moan and dump negativity on  you, whether you want it or not. They go on about what is wrong in their lives (mostly everything is) and how fate has been unjust to them and how things are really terrible for them. They repeat this to every single person and sometimes you just cannot escape especially if they happen to be your colleagues or worse your life partner!


 It is perfectly okay to feel sad and disappointed once in a way and express it to a close friend who can comfort and cheer you up.That does not make you a drain. But some people moan all the time, in various ways or sometimes they play the martyr or the victim. (I wish things were better for me). These are the people I mean when I say drains.

To the drains I have this to say: If you feel so bad about your situation, then do something about it! Stop moaning. Start acting. Do not dump your negativity on others please! They have their own problems without adding yours to the list.

Some people I know truly inspire me. Despite having real problems  (like having lost an organ or having a terminal illness or having lost a child or sometimes even a psychiatric condition) they are so positive and so full of fighting spirit.

Life is indeed terribly short and so darn fragile. Things can change in one second (as I have experienced). A person who is smiling and talking to you today may no longer be in your life tomorrow. Death of a loved one can be so sudden, so unexpected and it is not always something that happens to other people. (I had always thought so too till it happened to me)

So laugh a lot, love a lot more (tell the ones you love that you do. It would make them feel on top of the world) , do the things that you have always wanted to do put keep putting off, follow your heart and  LIVE life.

You have only one life. It is in your hands to make it a happy and contented one. You just have to change the way you look at it.

Then you will really find that true heaven is a place on earth ! :-)
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Current mood video (see right):   Belinda Carlisle 'True heaven is a place on earth':)

Comments

  1. Radiator...true radiator post :)
    Sometimes i have a feeling i am more of a drain..then i give myself a pep talk and try to becomes a radiator. And i get to know i am in right direction when people appreciate my nature and want to be with me..which is the ofcourse very inspiring :)
    Thanks!!

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  2. :) How true! the picture actually makes me want to run up and down that path heheh

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  3. Beautiful post .. It is jus' motivating me to lay my hand on your book, which I'm sure will very soon.

    I've come across both the radiator and the drain kinda people in my everyday life and Oh! how much changes each of them can bring in to one's life in bot the positive way and the other way around is so enormous.

    I sometimes truly believe in forcefully staying positive even when things don' go the way you might want them to and it does help to be that way many times :)

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  4. hmmm bit different from earlier two post.. liked the difference and the hidden message.

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  5. Yes, yes, yes and yes....totally agree. I've read this before but didnt mind reading it again coz all of us need to be reminded time to time about it. So thank U:-)!!!!

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  6. And oh what an absolutely gorgeous picture....how come no copyright on it;-o

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  7. Wow! that was one thought provoking, motivational post :)
    Loved the concept and name 'radiators'. We all should strive to become one and so dearly wish to have at least one in our lives.

    What a beautiful thought, I need to read your book soon :)

    P.S.- that's a beautiful picture, loved the color combination :)

    Cheers!!

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  8. So true :) - shrug off the worries and setbacks as soon as possible and live in the moment as much as you can!

    I will always strive to be a radiator!!!!

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  9. i love the way, the clarity with which you express thoughts. lovely post! i want to ask a question, can't 'radiators' help turn 'drains' into 'radiators' ? and answer i suppose is YES!

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  10. Many many thanks for this motivational post

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  11. beautiful pic and a lovely msg! :) you are going great!!

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  12. Gud Msg..
    I dnt y i feeel my PM & TL r like DRAINS :P..Hope before leaving i will change them to RADIATORS :)

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  13. So true. Inspiring and thought provoking post. Emotional parasites can drain away all the vitality in you. I normally run a mile from them because I get infected

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  14. This post just shook me up preeti. Of late had gone into a shell and this made me realize that I am slowly turning into a Drain. Thankyou for the wake up call!! :)

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  15. First of all, nice post and if I may, shall just I add a bright orange daisy to the bouquet above :)

    Secondly, the part where you say
    It is in your hands to make it a happy and contented one.
    I truly believe you have mastered the art of being positive. I have tried and keep trying to be that way, but somehow at times I feel like a drain - I even drain myself sometimes :P I admire you a lot for that! Stay this way, and keep making all of us happy with your posts! :)

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  16. A lovely post, Preeti and also a very inspiring one. True to every word. Thanks you for the positive feelings that I always get when I read your posts. Cheers,Gayu

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  17. Loved the beautiful and picturesque cheery cherry blossoms picture. The picture goes well with your inspiring post. Apologies for the double comment.

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  18. Awesome post and a cheerful image to go with it!!

    -Durga

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  19. Great post, inspiring and sweet both at the same time.

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  20. As always your posts are radiator to me..:)

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  21. Such a wonderful reminder for all of us to keep doing the things which we have always wanted to do but keep putting off...

    And, love the song "True heaven is a place on earth" :)

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  22. Wonderful thought.. Heaven is really on earth.. :)

    We all shud strive to be radiators.. :)

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  23. "Things can change in one second" There is no other person who has experienced it first hand than me. Lost both parents in a span of 1.5 years and I don't even have a sibling to share my feelings. Also I am too scared to talk to anyone else fearing I might be considered a drain :) But such incidents in life where you are totally helpless drain you out so much that you just won't have the energy to do anything in life how much ever you try..

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  24. Dhanya: i know. Hugs :( But eventually one does recover. And it is indeed OK to talk about it to close friends.That helped me a lot.

    Sushobhan: Yes. We all should!

    Palsworld: yes--song is indeed a lovely one :)

    Sundari: Your comments are a radiator to me! Thanks :)

    Thinker:Thank you!

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  25. Durga: Thank U :)

    Gayu: No problem at all! Double thank you :)

    MS: LOL. I admire your honesty! :) and truly I am not happy peppy all the time. Ask my closest friends :)

    Deepti: happy it was useful! Stay cheerful!

    Ritu: I get infected too! Sometimes one cannot run --then one needs a protection shield! :)

    Aruna (I couldnt read first part of your name in tamil. I could read second part): Thank U!

    Nischii: I dont follow SMSese :P PM,TL=?

    Mamta:Thank U!

    Prats: Thanks :)

    Aswathi: My pleasure.Thank you for commenting.

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  26. Roshan: Yes--but drains are basically like that by nature. I guess if they really try they can. they would only be helping themselves. Thank you for the compliments.

    Shachi: you already are!! I know it from interactions with you and from your blog!

    Chatterbox: Thanks for that comment which radiated warmth! :)

    Reflections: heheh. Thanks. Its not my pic :) I used the html from a site :)click on it to go to the site :)

    Mihir: I thought message was not hidden at all. it was direct!

    Shalini: i agree..sometimes when we force ourselves to be cheerful, we really begin to feel that way.

    Doli: yes! Now I also want to run up and down that path!! :D

    Life begins: thank u thank U for being one of my warmest radiator 'commenters' :)

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  27. its true and inspiring ..reminds me of" The Secret"
    thoughts and manifestations ....all in mind...
    excellent!

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  28. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  29. Harman: yes. I do believe in the same philosophy. The key here is to change thoughts. Thanks for commenting :)

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  30. I have had my share of drainers and radiators in my life. God only knows what I have been through with the drainers where its an emotionally draining experience and the end of it even a happy person can go into a depression. Loved the older post and loved this too.. And the picture is awesome. :)

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  31. Going by your description, I'd like to think I am healthy mix of drainer and radiator :D What is that category called?

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  32. that was a very nice post preeti...i thank you for your mail too..i know i am a drainer..but in my situation i didnt have any other choice..my MD exam practical is on 14th june..amidst all calamities i am attempting it..i dont want to be a drainer any more...

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