5 common misconceptions about relationships. Blog Marathon post 5

Being in a relationship, makes you feel special. There is this one person who you turn to for everything. There is this one person whose arms you can wrap yourself in, when the rest of the world doesn't understand. There is this one person, who understands you like no-other and who will always be around for you.

And yet, even the best of relationships,sometimes flounder. Things can go wrong, and what was once sweet might curdle.

Many of us have so many fixed ideas when it comes to relationships. Here are the biggest and the most common misconceptions about relationships.

1. You have to have same interests: One does not have to have the same interests as your partner. he may be interested in reading science fiction while you may be interested in anthropolgy and history. You might love to exercise and hit the gym, while his exercise may be limited to sprawling on the sofa and searching for the remote. There are so many couples who are as different as chalk and cheese. And yet they have a strong connect with each other, as they accept each other's differences.

 
2.You need the same friends :  Another big misconception is that once you become a couple, you need to have the same friends. This is not only an unrealistic and a forced expectation but it also puts a strain on the relationship. Your partner may not like some of your friends, and if you force him/her to socialise with them, they might do it for you, but may not enjoy it. Over a period of time,  it would just make things awkward. Enjoy your individual friendships and cherish them.

3.You have to do everything together : This is mostly seen in newly weds where the couple seems to be joined at the hip and they cannot bear to be apart even for a few minutes. And the thought of doing something seprately--Oh Perish it! It is 'we-we-we' all the way. While it may be great in the initial bliss of a new relationship, it can over a period of time, make you lose your individuality. So beware!

4.Your relationship will suffer if you fight: Many couples hate open confrontation, and hence 'adjust' for the sake of peace in a relationship. Studies show that passive aggressive behavior causes deep resentment, and over a period of time explodes as the affected party isn't able to take it anymore. If there is an issue, it is best to fight it out--and fight fair (without name calling, demeaning or saying derogatory stuff). Talk it out calmly--or wait till you are both calm and reason it out. if you are not able to reason it out, write an-email. Wait for a day--and see if you still mean the things you have said.

5.Your partner will fulfil all your needs Most of us are a blend of many personalities merged together. It is not possible for one single person to fulfil all the needs of another. This is the reason why a couple ought to have some ' our friends', some 'his friends' and some 'her friends'. Your husband/boyfriend can never take the place of your girl-friends. Men just don't get some things about women. Just like women won't ever get some things about Men's friendships.  So it is best to have an association with a variety of interesting people who keep you mentally stimulated, other than your partner

After all everyone knows that good relationships are a lot of work.

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If you want to read my latest book  which is a story on relationships you might want to check out
The One You Cannot Have

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