Skip to main content

Why being harsh on yourself harms you.


Here's my drawing/portrait for the day. Today I drew it from Sktchy which is a fabulous app (currently only for iphone users). It's a supportive community of artists and art lovers where people share their images--thousands and thousands of photos--which you can use as reference images.

I made this waterolour portrait from a reference image on sktchy.





Initially, I  was quite pleased with it, as I thought it was a good likeness. Then I began to compare and analyse with the reference image. You can swipe right on my instagram art account to see it fully.

The more I compared it, the unhappier I felt!

It made me think about how harsh we are on ourselves, sometimes. If a friend of mine had made the above image, I would have congratulated him/her and praised him/her for the great work done. I would have said it's a superb likeness (which it is). I wouldn't have pointed out the flaws, unless I was specifically asked for it.

Why then was I being harsh on myself?

I think we harm ourselves by trying for 'perfection'. Just to be clear: This is not to say, you should not try to better yourself. You definitely should.
That is the only way to grow.


However, if we have done out best about something, and the results are not exactly what we had in mind, we should learn to accept and let go. By beating up yourself about it, you feed the  N in our head, who is the critic. (I have written more about Y and N in a chapter in my book Love A Little Stronger)

By all means, strive to excel.
But also remember to pat yourself on the back for working hard and trying.
It is okay to be a little less than perfect!
_____________________________________
ps: See you tomorrow, with a new picture and a new post! This is a part of May Drawing Challenge where I post a picture I made every single day :)  Hit subscribe to get my posts in your inbox.

Buy Love a Little Stronger HERE

Comments

  1. The drawing is really very nice mam.
    And mam I would like to say a big Thank You to you for writing such inspiring and motivating posts....reading your blog really helps a lot whenever I am feeling sad, lonely or going through something. Keep writing and inspiring us. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. If you found fault with this pic, then definitely you are being harsh on yourself. 😯

    ReplyDelete
  3. If I try such a thing it may go beyond a km from the picture.You have done it and in rating it holds an A+. Still there is scope for improvement in self judgement.So on one side self-pampering and the other side pestering for improvement will make one grow more. Very nice.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I have ordered a very first book of yours madm... I know it's little late but I like you from the core of my heart..... By watching your YouTube videos and your definition of life was awesome....sometimes bubblegum sometimes candy

    ReplyDelete
  5. The sketch has come out sooooo well. Sometimes, I get confused about which is the sketch and which is the original photo!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate your leaving a comment! Okay--I appreciate your leaving a comment if you have something nice to say ;-)


Popular posts from this blog

Five rules I broke which changed the way I think

There are several rules that society imposes on Indian women (and men too.). Some of these rules are so  accepted, that nobody questions them. It is how we were raised. It is a part of our culture. It is just how we are.
I have always been a person who questions things. Even as a child, I was constantly questioning why things had to be the way they are. My mother, a strict disciplinarian would not encourage it, and there was no way out, other than just obeying whatever rules she laid down. In retrospect, it helped instill a sense of discipline in me.

In contrast, with my father, I could question everything. There was nothing which was taboo or forbidden. At the age of nine or perhaps ten,  encouraged by my father, I had read books like  'I'm OK, you're OK' by Thomas A Harris, and we would discuss things and analyse our conversation in terms discussed in the book. (transactional analysis)

My father did not believe in following anything blindly. He encouraged me to thin…

How I wrote eleven books: A true story of a very personal journey.

It was on this day twelve years ago that my father passed away. There was no warning, no illness, no ailments--nothing. He was alive one moment, chatting and talking to my mother. He had walked 5 kms , his usual  distance, that morning. He had meetings lined up for next day. He was to visit me in Pune, a week later. Instead he leaned back in his chair, while watching TV, closed his eyes and died.

The death changed my perception about everything. It altered forever the way I looked at life. It affected all parts of my being--my health, my daily routine, my philosophy, my core belief system. My father was my strength and my rock. I used to talk to him every day. My day was not complete, unless I had a discussion with him on the phone. He had a curious mind, and we used to talk about everything  in the universe. When he died, a part of me died with him.

 I had started this blog In October 2006,  forty five days after his death. I did not think about what I was doing or how long I would …

The Rule Breakers by Preeti Shenoy, Out in stores now! Also let's meet in these cities! :)

Yesterday, my eleventh book The Rule Breakers went out into the world!

It was a proud and a happy day :)






I had an interview at Red FM, and in the video above, you can see me, along with RJ Zeishah, and she loved the book. It was wonderful discussing the book with her.

The book is out in bookstores now.



So, you don't have to wait anymore, if you wish to read it :)

The story is a COMPLEX one. It begins very simply and easily. It is the story of Veda.
But after she gets married (at 19) to a guy chosen by her parents, and shifts to Pune from Joshimath, new people enter her life.  The timid, shy Veda must now carve her own path.

Here are a few characters from the book:



Follow Veda's story, as she goes through life, and find out for yourself, who the REAL rule-breakers  are in this book!

Get it from your local bookstore or order online and pay cash on deliver:  http://preeti.io/trb


Folks in Pune and Ahmedabad, I am coming to your city! Folks in Ahmedabad--it is a closed event on 20…