Skip to main content

Keep egos out. keep the love in. (blog marathon post 12)

Sometime back, a friend had asked me 'What plans for the weekend?'
I replied ' I am a writer. We don't make any weekend plans. We write.'


It was the same for me, this Sunday. After my short break in Mumbai, I landed in Bangalore to sunny skies and an overflowing inbox. My proofs of the new novel were waiting for me. And that's what I did yesterday. Worked.
I have also enrolled for an art course online (they are based in the US) , and I was quite excited to start that one. So soon, I will have sketches to show you.


The other thing that happened today---I was on the front page of the Times of India's Times Life.

It was about whether it is okay to share passwords and check your spouse's or partner's phone.Here's what I said.





Today, a friend (who also writes) and I were talking about communicating. Many a time, when we  communicate, we write or express what we feel. But the way it is interpreted by the other person could be completely different from what you meant.
This is precisely why when an email or a text between two people,is read by another, there can be misunderstandings.
Even between two people, when you writeor say something, the other person may read between the lines. Or may take into account your body language, or bring into it, the baggage from the past. The words then taken on a shade never intended.

If that has ever happened, the best thing to do is apologise immediately and unconditionally, if the relationship matters to you.
Ina relationship, there should never be room for ego. If you allow an egoto come in, soon it will turn into a squatter, and then become a permanent occupant, and you will not be able to get rid of that monster, who will ultimately gobble up the relationship.

Keep egos out.
keep the love in.

Till tomorrow, stay focused, spend time with your loved ones, read, relax, rejuvenate.
Look after yourself!
________________________________________

 Buy preeti shenoy's books at a fab price!

Comments

  1. Really true Mam...:)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah. ..relationships are really fragile

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yeah. ..relationships are really fragile

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous1:28 PM

    hello mam,i am regular blooger of yours.every fan says that i am big fan of yours but not in my case. you are my mentor in indirect way of my life. in front of all your readers i say BIG THANK U fr SAVING my life as well as give PURPOSE of my life by YOUR BLOGS and YOUR ALL NOVELS.

    and mam this blog, i will comment that

    "Sharing password is not big thing.in every relationship sharing password with trust dnt fr snooping purpose. Sharing bank password will help in worst time in dead of another partner for living"


    agn thank u mam fr writing and fr changing all life.
    really u r HOPE of life

    ReplyDelete
  5. I have always felt that communication is one of the key points in any relationships. Because there are chances of misunderstanding especially when people are not able to express exactly what they want. In their mind, they know what they want to tell another person, but the way the other person interprets it might be different. As far as passwords are concerned, I feel it is not necessary to share them with the significant other. We all need to have our own identity and if we share everything with our partner, it might cause more harm than good. What one person likes, the other may not like, but it's not because they should not like, it's just that that is the way they are. When you start doubting the other, then problems arise which could lead to a lot of danger. So always have a open mind when it comes to your relationships :-)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ego is of course one of the main reason in corroding a relationship. Relationships have to be reviewed and renewed. If any things seems to be going wrong through a review matters have to be sorted out before they get out of hand. Relationships also need a renewal. Surprising one's partner in a different way or doing something different for the partner.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Completely agree with you mam... If you value the relationship more than you do to your ego, then there should be no problem for you to apologise even if you're not on the wrong side. And the other thing I do feel about is when you love someone truly, then forgiving that person for silly mistake should not be a big deal how extreme the mistake might be. You can always resolve issues later.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Woow..!!! Straight to the point..!!! Very well said..

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate your leaving a comment! Okay--I appreciate your leaving a comment if you have something nice to say ;-)


Popular posts from this blog

Re-store : A delightful little shop in Whitefield, Bangalore.

All of us are guilty, at least to some extent  of hoarding stuff. We hold on to old things--be it clothes, books, utensils, footwear, knick-knacks or some such, that form the minutiae of our daily lives. Many a time these add to the the clutter too. Rare is the home which looks like the above pic.


I am a huge fan of Marie Kondo, and I highly recommend her book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up  which is more than just a book.

It is an entire philosophy, and a new approach. I read the book back to back, and immediately put into use the methods described in the book. I must tell you how wonderful I felt! I never thought that I could be that organised.

Clearing clutter, and the stuff that you no longer have use for, does release 'blocked energy.' There is no scientific or rational explanation for this. I only know that it works for me. Any Feng Shui practitioner and  loads of Eastern Schools of belief will confirm this.

I always make it a point to give away things I no longe…

Three powerful things every aspiring writer must do.

On Saturday, I got a message from my publisher.
'Check the Hindustan Times today; We're at No.5 and No.8,' he said.

I checked immediately, and my heart leapt up in joy.  TWO of my books were indeed among the highest selling fiction books in the country. My publisher also sent me this nice creative!




 I felt very happy, because it's not easy for a book to climb into the charts MONTHS after it's release. In the case of Life is What You Make It, it is TEN YEARS since  I wrote that book. Having the books there was validation that people find comfort and joy in my writing.

I have grown as a writer, with every book I have written. I do work very hard at my craft. I am constantly trying to write better. I write every single day---although everything is not for publication. I have a desk full of notebooks and diaries which I have filled over the years. I have my gratitude journal, my daily journal, my story ideas, my blog posts, my emails, my one minute writing exercises. …

The number one essential to be a succesful writer.

What is the most important thing, a writer must do, in order to be successful? I am often asked this.

Now 'being successful' itself can be defined in several ways. If you are an aspiring writer, I would consider the first step of success as completing a manuscript. If you have managed to sit down and have completed writing a book, you are successful, whether you have managed to find a publisher or not. You  have successfully crossed the first step.


The other question I am usually asked is about my art. One of the things I do, in between my writing is my art. I am asked questions like how it helps my writing, and whether a writer should have other forms of creative expression, other than writing.

I don't think a writer truly needs to have any other form of creative expression, if they are not inclined! If you are passionate about writing and you have no other creative pursuits, that is perfectly okay. To say that one must have other creative pursuits apart from writing…