Skip to main content

How to tell if someone is too old or young for you? (Blog marathon post 5)




 Today's post is an extract from my book Why We Love the Way We do, which is a non-fiction book on relationships. It was among the top 5 highest selling non-fiction titles of 2015.
____________________________________________________________________________________
When the question of who is too old for you and who is too young for you to date is asked, invariably the half-your-age plus seven rule comes up as an answer whether you are a man or a woman. So if you are a 42 year old woman, you can date any guy who is 28 or older. If you are a man who is 30, you can date a woman who is 22 or older.

Who made this rule up? The origin of this rule is hard to pin down, but it finds mention in the 1953 film The Moon is Blue, where Maggie McNamara twenty-two, asks her suitor who is thirty, ‘Haven’t you heard that the girl is supposed to be half the man’s age plus seven?’ This rule also finds mention in the popular television series, How I Met Your Mother.

The exact opposite  this rule defines the upper age limit to determine the ‘oldest person you can date’.  Here you double your age and then subtract seven find out the oldest someone you date should be, ideally. Thus according to the rule,  if you are a 32 year old woman you cannot date a man who is older than 57.

I find that these ‘rules’ really cannot be applied to any relationship to determine the age limit.  For  rules to be applicable they  have to be consistent. But these rules are not consistent as the pair grows older. To elucidate, let us take the case of a person who is currently twenty-six. As per the rule, he cannot date someone who is nineteen. But when the person turns twenty-eight, then the pair qualifies to date  as the other person is now twenty-one. Thus, if this rule is followed strictly, a person can ‘qualify socially’ to date another who is older within just a year or two, if their ages currently fall within an ‘unaccepted’ range. How can your personality or other parameters necessary for a good relationship actually change that much within such a short span?



Buy the book: Bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
Download the first few chapters free!: http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

Comments

  1. Concept is Very Clear what u mentioned as man can date to a woman who's age is 5-10 years more than him and woman too. some reality shows has the episodes according to this case. But dating between the ages where is gap of 15-20 is not possible. Hence, perspective.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The word cannot here should be replaced by it is best not to I guess

    ReplyDelete
  3. The word cannot here should be replaced by it is best not to I guess

    ReplyDelete
  4. Relationships are based on so many factors. When it comes to age, it is difficult to understand. Sometimes, if there is a huge age gap between the man and woman, they say there is a lot of maturity and if the gap is less, then there isn't. But that does not apply to everyone does it? I feel that no matter what age the man and woman are, a relationship will work only if there is understanding, love, financial and physical support, etc. We see so many celebrities all over the world dating people who are half or twice their age. Some people may find this absurd, but since there is compatibility between the two, the relationship will work out.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't think people really care about the age factor while falling in love... Love is smthing dat happens in a span which is less than a second. The whole theory about the age isn't wat we should be luking for, instead.concentrate on the perceptions, thoughts and dreams of your partner to be able to build a strong and loving relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I bit disagree on this. Relationships, I have seen, does not much depend on the age. Its how the chemistry between the people work and how well they gel up together. Again if that chemistry between people is dependant on the age, need to analyse..!!! :)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate your leaving a comment! Okay--I appreciate your leaving a comment if you have something nice to say ;-)

Popular posts from this blog

A Hundred Little Flames. How I signed 3000 copies!

In the past, I have blogged about how I signed 3000 copies of my previous novels, The Secret Wishlist, The One You Cannot Haveand also It's All In the Planets.
(Click on each one to read about the signing of those books)

I have also written aboutwhy I sign my books 'With Love, Preeti Shenoy'. (Do read the post)

It is that time of the year again, when I sign my pre-orders. I have just got back from Manipal, utterly exhausted with knotted shoulder muscles, numb finger tips and a feeling of wanting to sleep for a hundred years. I am bone-dead tired.

I left for Manipal, on 25th which has one of India's finest and most advanced Printing press. To reach Manipal, you have to travel to Mangalore, and then go by road, a journey about an hour and a half. My flight was late, and by the time I reached Manipal it was about 7.30 pm. I checked into the hotel, and knew I had two long days ahead of me.

The next morning, we reached the press at 9.00 am.

This picture was clicked just be…

A Hundred Little Flames - Chapter 1

There were two completely unrelated incidents that happened on Sunday, which would change Ayan’s life forever.

1. He attended an office party thrown by his boss in a swanky uptown pub in Pune.
2.More than a thousand miles away, in a small village in Kerala, not identifiable by Google Maps, his grandfather had a fall.

On Monday morning, unaware of anything but the clock on his computer ticking, Ayan took a sip of the horrendous office tea with over-boiled tea leaves, too much milk and sugar. He had only forty-five minutes left before the meeting was to begin. Beads of perspiration trickled down his forehead into his eye, and he blinked. His brow furrowed, he sat hunched, with an ache in his neck, his fingers flying across the keyboard. He felt as though somebody was raining blows inside his head. His throat was parched despite the tea, and now his stomach began to feel queasy as well.
He regretted having that fourth tequila last night. But Randhir had insisted. You can hardly…