Skip to main content

How to tell if someone is too old or young for you? (Blog marathon post 5)




 Today's post is an extract from my book Why We Love the Way We do, which is a non-fiction book on relationships. It was among the top 5 highest selling non-fiction titles of 2015.
____________________________________________________________________________________
When the question of who is too old for you and who is too young for you to date is asked, invariably the half-your-age plus seven rule comes up as an answer whether you are a man or a woman. So if you are a 42 year old woman, you can date any guy who is 28 or older. If you are a man who is 30, you can date a woman who is 22 or older.

Who made this rule up? The origin of this rule is hard to pin down, but it finds mention in the 1953 film The Moon is Blue, where Maggie McNamara twenty-two, asks her suitor who is thirty, ‘Haven’t you heard that the girl is supposed to be half the man’s age plus seven?’ This rule also finds mention in the popular television series, How I Met Your Mother.

The exact opposite  this rule defines the upper age limit to determine the ‘oldest person you can date’.  Here you double your age and then subtract seven find out the oldest someone you date should be, ideally. Thus according to the rule,  if you are a 32 year old woman you cannot date a man who is older than 57.

I find that these ‘rules’ really cannot be applied to any relationship to determine the age limit.  For  rules to be applicable they  have to be consistent. But these rules are not consistent as the pair grows older. To elucidate, let us take the case of a person who is currently twenty-six. As per the rule, he cannot date someone who is nineteen. But when the person turns twenty-eight, then the pair qualifies to date  as the other person is now twenty-one. Thus, if this rule is followed strictly, a person can ‘qualify socially’ to date another who is older within just a year or two, if their ages currently fall within an ‘unaccepted’ range. How can your personality or other parameters necessary for a good relationship actually change that much within such a short span?



Buy the book: Bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
Download the first few chapters free!: http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

Comments

  1. Concept is Very Clear what u mentioned as man can date to a woman who's age is 5-10 years more than him and woman too. some reality shows has the episodes according to this case. But dating between the ages where is gap of 15-20 is not possible. Hence, perspective.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The word cannot here should be replaced by it is best not to I guess

    ReplyDelete
  3. The word cannot here should be replaced by it is best not to I guess

    ReplyDelete
  4. Relationships are based on so many factors. When it comes to age, it is difficult to understand. Sometimes, if there is a huge age gap between the man and woman, they say there is a lot of maturity and if the gap is less, then there isn't. But that does not apply to everyone does it? I feel that no matter what age the man and woman are, a relationship will work only if there is understanding, love, financial and physical support, etc. We see so many celebrities all over the world dating people who are half or twice their age. Some people may find this absurd, but since there is compatibility between the two, the relationship will work out.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't think people really care about the age factor while falling in love... Love is smthing dat happens in a span which is less than a second. The whole theory about the age isn't wat we should be luking for, instead.concentrate on the perceptions, thoughts and dreams of your partner to be able to build a strong and loving relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I bit disagree on this. Relationships, I have seen, does not much depend on the age. Its how the chemistry between the people work and how well they gel up together. Again if that chemistry between people is dependant on the age, need to analyse..!!! :)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate your leaving a comment! Okay--I appreciate your leaving a comment if you have something nice to say ;-)

Popular posts from this blog

Preeti Shenoy--New novel releasing soon!

Preeti Shenoy--Cover releaseCountdown
There's some exciting news for you :) My new novel is releasing in November. The pre-order link will be up on October 7th.

The cover  (and the title) will be unveiled for the very first time in Birmingham UK.
I am a keynote speaker at the Birmingham Literature Festival.



Desi Blitzwhich is Britain's  award winning, leading  Asian web-magazine, has been co-ordinating the whole event, and have been corresponding with me over the last many months to make this happen.




I am very very excited about it. I will be travelling to UK in October. I used to live in UK, andone of my novels features Norwich, the place where I used to live.
(Yes, I will be travelling to Norwich too, later, after the cover release).

You can watch the unveiling of the cover --LIVE by following myFacebook author page. (Hover over 'like' and enable 'see first' to not miss any notification)
You can also follow the page as there will be a lot of fun stuff happenin…

Meghalya --kissed by the clouds (post 26)

Greetings from Meghalaya. True to it's name, it is a place kissed by the clouds. As I type this, from my picture window, the rain falls gently outside making a pitter-patter sound. It feels like I am living inside a poem.

We drove from Shillong to Mawlynnong, which has earned the moniker of Asia's cleanest village. The drive itself was arduous, as the mountain roads are terrible. Since I ave been so many times to the Western ghats in South India, this just seemed like a poor cousin in comparison. The roads in South India are much much better. After a bone-rattling torturous car ride, we arrived tired and hungry. We ate at a small restaurant (sticky rice, watery dal and some kind of delicious chutney made of onion, tomato and green chillies loosely pounded). Then we began our walk to see the living root bridges.

That was AMAZING. It is a sight worth seeing. I felt the forests in Avatar movie had come alive from the sets and had been resurrected here. I couldn't help marve…

Greetings from Cherrapunji --A heart shaped rock and other true stories (post 28)

We began our day with a trek down the mountains, through the pine forests. We didn't have a guide. Satish and I decided to explore the path on our own. It was slippery in many places, and we had to be certain of our footing, else we would have tumbled down. Tall coniferous trees formed dense canopies, through which sunlight couldn't trickle down. Ferns, spider-webs, mushrooms and pine-cones dotted the path. It was dark, damp, green and oh so pure. We walked down slowly, and a magnificent sight greeted us. I am sharing a picture I clicked.


We climbed back, contented happy souls. We found a vantage point from where we had a view of this very lake that we had trekked down to. I stood there and made a painting.


After breakfast, we left forCherrapunjee.

Just before we reached Cherrapunjee, we took a diversion went to The Garden of Caves in Laitmawsiang. The sight is mesmerising, stunning, fascinating. It is a must-do if you ever visit North-East. The main attraction is the natural…