Tuesday, January 22, 2008

The power of words

words

When people write to me and tell me how much my words and my posts motivate them, I feel moved. I feel happy. And I feel delighted that what started as a journey to help myself ended up bringing sunshine to many.


Shruti wrote about it in her post 'Blessed with a friend' .I was so moved .(So many people said so many nice things about me in the comments section there--I thank you all) Ajay mentioned it here. Misti wrote a post recently mentioning how my blog inspired her to pursue something she always wanted to. (click on the coloured words)

Rayne of Crunchybits and somanystories.com says “Before you groan and say, “Not another mommy blog.” let me assure you this blog is much, much, more than that. Preeti is an incredible writer whose posts are filled with warmth, humor, compassion and the joy of life and while some of her entries are about her children, after all they are a big part of her life, they aren’t cloying or annoying. She also blogs about so much more. Memories of her past, her travels, her interactions with other people, and the big wide world around her. I envy her ability to travel and see so many interesting places and it always pleases me when she shares her adventures through photos and words. She shares her days with us candidly and in this way invites us into her life. Her blog is one of my daily reads and I believe it will be one of yours, too.”

I don’t forget kind words easily.(They are so hard to come by) It is the same with unkind words. I was hurt and upset sometime back when someone I consider a good friend said that my blog is lousy, he doesn’t like my writing style (yes, he is entitled to his opinion- I know) and most of it is stupid sentimental stuff.(Maybe it is because it is heartfelt) It reminded me of my post on ‘Truth speakers’.

Most of us are so conditioned to condone rudeness. Many of us find it easier to point out that the person being rude has a free right of speech and there might be truth in what he or she says. Many of us question ourselves (Did I over react? Did he/she really mean what he said?) Some of us even sub consciously defend the wrong doer (May be I should have stood up for myself but he/she was right.)

What I firmly believe is that no matter what the person meant (or didn’t mean) if their words hurt you, then your feelings ARE valid. Do not make excuses for them. Tell them how much it hurt you and why. If they really care they will apologise and make an effort to remember it next time.


Some people are so negative. They find it hard to be happy. They find it hard to muster enthusiasm. If you want to do something they will point out reasons why it cannot be done. If you want to write a book, they will tell you that there are hundreds of hopefuls who want to be the next J.K Rowling and publishing houses wont even look at your manuscript. If you want to paint a picture (or pursue your hobby of photography) and if you dare dream of holding your own exhibition they will delight in telling you that it is very difficult, as there are thousands of more talented people out there.

Do not listen to them. I firmly believe that what the human mind can imagine, it can achieve.


Sometimes, I’m grateful to the negative people too. I find that when I am getting too comfortable and laid back in a nice routine, then a sharp jab from someone makes me think. It makes me act—and shakes me out of my comfort zone—making me more determined to pursue my dream and chase my goals.


I felt a sense of satisfaction today when I got my first earning from my writing. (An article I wrote for a local paper was published in December) I have always been interested in writing and really enjoyed it. But I never pursued it as a career or did not even think that I could be earning from it.(Compared to what I earn from my Thinking workshops, it is really a pittance, but still this is the first time I'm getting paid for writing)


Paths always open up. Always. Sometimes unexpectedly, sometimes with relentless pursuit. But they do. Despite the drains, nay-sayers and the negative thinkers—or maybe because of them!


40 comments:

  1. Very beautiful post. There's too much negativity. So much nicer to hear and say a kind word. That's why I don't care for politcal blogs or those really snarky ones. A little edge is ok, but flat ot meanness is not called for.

    I enjoy your blog myself (obviously.)

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  2. Congratulations on your payday! :)

    Great post, enjoyed it just as much as all your other posts. While at Toastmasters, a senior member of our club usually honors the officers by presenting them with great quotes. During my term, I received four quotes one of which goes as follows.

    "Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really the great make you feel that you, too, can become great" - Mark Twain

    We just cannot avoid the negative ones, but as you say, ignore them or take it for whatever its worth and move on.

    As always enjoy your words. Continue writing...

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  3. Amazing post Preeti!
    I agree with the many things you said here!
    Especially about if words hurt you, your feelings are valid no matter what. And how even though negative people do kind of spoil a lot of things, they do have some (very little) valid points to say at times!

    I too do absolutely love your blog !!
    It has too become part of my daily reading :)

    Congrats on making your dream come true! I always thought since day 1 you were a writer - just love the way you write!! :)

    - The other Shru

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  4. Lovely post Preeti. My day starts with a cup of filter coffee and 'Just a mother of Two's post. I periodically check for an update just incase i dont see one in the morning. Way to go & Good luck :)

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  5. There is always a place for constructive critisism..but so few know how to give it properly...done like this it is a tool, to build a person up, not tear them down. I always feel built up by your writting..you have such a caring and yet pointed opinion which always challenges and encourages. How could anyone be anything other than complementary about you!?

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  6. you hit the nail right there when you said that *a sharp jab from someone makes me think. *...it does work...

    congrats on the first earning..may it multiply..and your writing reach new heights...

    and i have learnt the hard way...you can never make EVERYONE happy...so just concentrate on keeping your conscience happy and i think teh rest follows...(jus te way i look at it )

    so happy writing!!!

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  7. lovely post PS! U write so well...u hv a gift.


    words r so powerful..I once blogged on this topic and my title was 'Verbal Bullets' :)


    **or maybe because of them!

    loved how u put it! So true.


    Keshi.

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  8. hey!!! congrats on your first cheque! (when do i get my treat???)

    i think there are 2 shades of negativity.

    the first is the negative feedback from people who matter. or people who care about us. in their negative feedback lies hidden a positive message for us. it is up to us to look beyond the uoter negativity and see the true message in it for us.

    the second kind is the one which is negative feedback born out of the other person's fear, bitterness, jealousy, inadequacy and all such negative feelings. these are best ignored, smiled at, forgiven. and maybe there is a message in these negative reactions too!

    we feel hurt... and we need to ask ourselves what it is exactly that hurt us? is it because of some inadequacy we feel? or because we feel rejected? and then it slowly dawns upon us that the problem is not with the other person giving us the negative feedback. but within us because we interpreted is negatively. we entertained those negative thoughts.

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  9. btw, i loved the pic with the squirly words. you wrote them?

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  10. negativity is contagious and its a disease I feel....but at the end of the day, its our own conscience and our actions that's going to determine our peace. Its tough to say let go...but it should be done.

    I loved this line **I firmly believe that what the human mind can imagine, it can achieve. **


    Congrats on the new beginnings and praying that you'll get more and more

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  11. I got tagged recently and decided to play along, in response I am tagging you. See my blog for details.

    I loved this post!

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  12. Mary: Loved what u wrote too!Glad you stopped by

    Prats:Thanks so much, my friend.

    Guru: let me hasten to add--this is NOT my first pay cheque!!I do workshops for children on thinking skills.Compared to what I make from there--this one is a pittance.But from WRITING--this is the first time I've made money.Nopes--The graphic was from photobucket.As regards negativity by 'people who care' see my other post--'The truth speakers.'

    Keshi: i am coming right over to your blog and searching for verbal bullets!

    Thinking aloud: First earning from WRITING!!(but thanks!) Compared to my workshops what i made here is a pittance--but still from writing its the first time.

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  13. Niall: :-) smiling a big smile after reading the last line of your comment.

    Chitra: Wow!I'm honoured that its as important as your morning cuppa.

    Shru (the other one): Thanks! I tried coming over to yours--but permission is denied--could you please allow me to enter. (Waiting outside--knocking)

    HM: you are a memeber of toastmaster?Wow!I've always been into public speaking (school and college days) and toastmasters was something that interested me.(among many other things!)Wise words indeed.(what the senior member said)

    Nessa:Thanks! tried looking for that game of finding images on your blog(you have so many!)Couldnt find it.I thought I'd bookmarked it--Is it still on?

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  14. Hello Preethi,

    Reading your post, i inferred thats your name. I am truly touched by this post. I could very well sense the selflessness in your thoughts and to that extent you are above all these accolades that are being showered on you. Still you deserve it and much more.

    To put in nutshell, you are what I have always aspired to be. But only on having an indepth reading of your blog, I could realise the enormity of my aspiration and the perseverance it would take to achieve it.

    I repeat, you are an invaluable treasure to those who know you.

    I have added you to my links without your permission, please bear.

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  15. Hari: You are really kind--and thanks so much.You have elevated me to a position I dont really deserve. I was writing to help myself--but when it helps others I'm happy! And no probs at all about linking me.I'm honoured.

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  16. Thanks Keshi! Left a comment there.

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  17. hey I know that...mebbe i shd have added..WRITING...i thought you knew it too ...:)

    an error... in my haste to publish...

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  18. ...because you're worth it :)
    Congratulations for being a professional 'writer' now! Couldn't agree more with the negativity thing you wrote, I also agree with guruprasad-about negative feedbacks from people who matter, and from others.. we take it so differently. AND.. being grateful to negative people.. aah.. that's something I have to learn now!!

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  19. Thinking aloud: sorry for doubting you M'am! ;-)

    Shru: Thanks thanks thanks! Some people only criticise no matter what you do. You just cannot do anything about those excpet learn and move on.

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  20. Preeti,
    Pls do visit my blog whenever you find time. You valuable input would be of much help in improving my thoughts.

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  21. Thanks P, your blog truly inspires me, and there are so few people left in this world who has that ability. You are the best *hugs*. As for negative comments, i agree with Niall, very few people can give constructive criticism, most are so engrossed in their egos that they deminish others. And we should make our feelings clear to such people, if you are hurt, you are hurt, and they should know it.

    And hey, many congratulations for your first paychek from writting. Waiting to read the article :D

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  22. Hari: i did visit you and left a comment too on the post about Kuruvis.Do check!!

    Misti: *hugs* :-) As regards the aryicle it was a 500 words piece on 'concept calendars'.(calendars that are different from the rest) Nothing inspiring or heartfelt!

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  23. ok, so its not your first pay cheque. but i still need my treat!

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  24. what is it about you that inspires me to believe
    in dreams and life all over again?
    i create new worlds
    with flowers and streams and butterflies too
    and i imagine us walking hand in hand with the sand between our toes....

    and i wake up with hope kindled afresh in my heart!

    p.s. i used the words in your pic. and the lady in this poem is my daughter, just in case people start wondering and squeal to my wife.

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  25. Congratsssssssss P.....im so happy for u!!! n like they say..thers 2 sides to a coin..so ther r positive n negative ppl......just take wats best in the best spirit!!!
    Im very proud to have a friend like u :)Keep writing!!!

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  26. I know of one relative of mine who's such a nay sayer. Damn...how I hate the bugger. I ought to send him to you to help change his mind and his attitude. Cheers!
    Ravi
    ravikumar.blogdrive.com

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  27. Great news..
    Way to go PS!!

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  28. you have a beautiful mind - thanks for sharing :)

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  29. I also believe there is nothing truer than our feelings so we must listen to them and also surround ourselves with inspiring people like you, people that help us feel that we can do things, that somehow validate our dreams. :)

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  30. Hey Preeti...first of all, your writing is superb...and if so-called friends have been telling u otherwise, they are just plain jealous...

    Your blog is super cool and your posts are always a welcome treat...

    As for earning from the print medium...yup, I suppose it has finally come of age. Although it is still pittance compared to a lot of other things, its worth it if u are telling a story u wanted to tell, and hey, people are gonna read it, and the double whammy is that u even get paid for it!!!

    When it rains, it pours..and I hope it holds true for you as well. All the best and even if Im unable to catch ur work, I hope u've kept the clippings away...

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  31. Negative people can be so draining, but I also find eternal optimists draining at times too, generally when they refuse to be practical and things are not as rosy as they think they are. I think the answer lies in balance. I think the main thing is to not let negative people get you down, let positive people buoy you but keep your feet on the ground :)

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  32. Bob-Kat: That was a new view point!Gave me something to think about!

    Ritu:Thanks!I wish the same for you.And please text me whenever any article of yours comes.Would love to read.As regards the friends who tell me otherwise--I dont think it is jealousy.It is what they really feel--and yes they are entitled to their opinion.But it does give me satisfaction that no matter what they say THEY arent able to write like that!(Judging from their blogs)

    DM: And encouraging people like you!! Thanks!

    Pinkdogwood:Thanks and thanks for dropping by!

    Dame's diary:Thanks!

    Ravi:Poor guY--i dont think anyone can change their minds excpet themselves!

    Pai:THANK U--you have been ne of my greatest encouragers--and i'm glad I'm in touch with you!!

    Guru:LOVELY poem--I really liked it.Your wife doesnt read your blog?!(since you mention squealing)

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  33. you chose to remain silent on the treat! but i am going to shamelessly keep plugging away and keep reminding you ;D

    my wife does read my blog. which explains why i am so well-behaved and polite and use no profanities in my posts! but i don't think she knows about my alter-ego, the guy who goes exploring the blogosphere leaving sundry comments everywhere.

    would this be classified as virutal infidelity? ;P

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  34. I dont believe in giving treats.I should be the one getting a treat as it is MY achievement! Actually I dont want a treat.Give me a gift instead. (a good book or a perfume)There--I cant be more specific now--see how easy i have made your task.
    As regards Virtual infidelity maybe you'll find this useful

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  35. ok, about the treat, message received loud and clear. i guess you have to now let me know how to reach your gift across to you. i would prefer handing it over personally!

    the link you sent made for smoe very interesting reading. but what's your take on it?

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  36. Guru: Oh--you could just hand it over to my secretary.I'll have my office (husband manages it) call you. ;-)
    As regards the article I don't believe in infdelity--Emotional,Virtual or real.Period.

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  37. hahaha... ouch that hurt!

    i guess i'll have my secretary call your secretary and have them fix it all up for us ;P

    i believe in hi-fidelity - the stereophonic variety!

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  38. ROFL all over the cricket field for above conversation =))

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  39. drains or neg ppl do sometimes trigger us n act as catalysts...its imp to hv them too or like u said we might get too comfortable with life the way it is...

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