Skip to main content

Philosophy of sex

I found these quotes outrageuosly funny, mostly because they had an underlying patina of truth in them! Read them and tell me if you laughed, smiled, were amused or just non-plussed !!
And hey--in case you are wondering--I did not make them up :-)
And like I always tell my friend (you know who you are!) I agree whole heartedly with the last quote!
******************************************************************
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."--Tom Clancy

"You know "that look" women get when they want sex? Me neither."--Steve Martin

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."--Woody Allen

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."--Rodney Dangerfield

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."--Lynn Lavner

"Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog, vacation at the taxidermist."--Matt Barry

"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."--George Burns

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant."--George Burns

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."--Sharon Stone

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex ---no matter what she's reading."--Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."--Jack Nicholson


" Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."--Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady -- and you didn't think Barbara had a sense of humor)

"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."--Robin Williams

"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself."--Roseanne

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."--Billy Crystal

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."--Robert De Niro

"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"--Dustin Hoffman

"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, ‘I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked.’"--Jerry Seinfeld

"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house."--Rod Stewart

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."--Robin Williams

Comments

  1. Love the new picture of you!

    Speaking as a man (I've tried speaking as a woman but it hurt my throat)I find laughter is the best medicine when confronted with the falabilities of the human mating ritual.Speaking as an artist, I believe in passionate expression and technique. The quotes are wonderful..I laughed like a drain (or should that be a radiator?)

    ReplyDelete
  2. When it comes to you Niall, definitely a radiator! The new picture of me, was clicked just a few hours ago in my bedroom and its already reached the whole world(well, almost!) --The wonders of technology!I never cease to be amazed.

    ReplyDelete
  3. OH, those were so funny!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. These are really amazing quotes...I loved all of them.My favorite is the one about bridges by woody allen.... i laughed like anything!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate your leaving a comment! Okay--I appreciate your leaving a comment if you have something nice to say ;-)


Popular posts from this blog

Re-store : A delightful little shop in Whitefield, Bangalore.

All of us are guilty, at least to some extent  of hoarding stuff. We hold on to old things--be it clothes, books, utensils, footwear, knick-knacks or some such, that form the minutiae of our daily lives. Many a time these add to the the clutter too. Rare is the home which looks like the above pic.


I am a huge fan of Marie Kondo, and I highly recommend her book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up  which is more than just a book.

It is an entire philosophy, and a new approach. I read the book back to back, and immediately put into use the methods described in the book. I must tell you how wonderful I felt! I never thought that I could be that organised.

Clearing clutter, and the stuff that you no longer have use for, does release 'blocked energy.' There is no scientific or rational explanation for this. I only know that it works for me. Any Feng Shui practitioner and  loads of Eastern Schools of belief will confirm this.

I always make it a point to give away things I no longe…

A few happy things!

Over the last few days, I have been making a portrait every single day, as a part of#Risedrawas well as the May Drawing challenge. Initially I was posting my portraits every single day, on this blog. Then I realised that not too many people read this blog for  my portraits :) Also I do have a dedicatedInstagram page for my art where I post daily!

I didn't see any point in duplicating the same here. Especially because, I also post it on sktchy app. So to post it a third time on my blog, didn't make any sense.

 In case  you do not have an Instagram account, you can still click on the link, bookmark it, and see it from your laptop :)

Apologies to all those who have written to me saying that they are disappointed that I didn't post daily here--this was the reason.



Also a big thank you to all of you who interpreted the 'heart signs' that I had been seeing everywhere.
I want to tell you all, that the heart signs continued the next day too! It was the craziest thing ever…

Are you missing a sign? (or What do you think this means?)

Yesterday, something strange happened to me.
In the mornings and in the evenings, I always take my dog for a walk. Sometimes, we go thrice a day.
Yesterday, in the morning, when I went for my walk, I saw this.

 It was a little rope which was lying in my path in the shape of a heart. I just found it cute and amusing. So I clicked a picture and posted in on my Instagram stories. (I keep posting  throughout the day, tiny snippets from my life.) Those of you who follow me on instagram, must have seen this in my feed. You can see my foot and my dog's paw in the above photo.

Then I walked on. A few minutes later, I found another rope/chord lying on my path--and this one too in the shape of a heart! I clicked another photo.

Here too you can see my foot and my dog's paw.

I had read a lot of posts from Erin Pavlina, as in the past many remarkable coincidences kept happening in my life. Erin has written a very useful piece,where she explains how to tell if something is a sign from the…