Friday, March 31, 2017

How to escape emotional pain (post 30)

A54-year-old plastic surgeon, Dr Ashok Raj Koul, who is known for advanced surgeries like such as reconstruction of breast and Brachia Plexus injuries, committed suicide on Thursday by jumping off the 10th floor of his residential apartment complex in Bangalore. His colleagues were shocked. He was supposed to have performed two surgeries later that day. He is survived by his wife, who is also a doctor, and two daughters, one studying abroad and the other a student of class 10. In another incident, a 76-year-old retired bank manager leapt to his death from his ninth floor apartment. His wife said he had been depressed over his failing health because of his age.

Each year, around the time of the declaration examination results, there are a few cases of student suicides reported. For some time, there is anguish expressed over social media as well as in newspapers and television, about how we should not pressurise our young people about their academic results. The furore dies down after a few days, only for the whole saga to play itself out the following year, this time with different names, different faces.

One of the suicide prevention websites snehaindia.org states that in India, 1,00,000 people commit suicide each year, and every five minutes, someone in India attempts to commit suicide, making it the third major cause of death. They also dispel myths about suicides, one of the biggest being that people, who commit suicide do not talk about it. The fact is people do talk about it, and anyone who mentions it, should be taken seriously. Also it is a myth that most suicidal people have absolute intent of dying. The fact is they take a gamble with death and are ambivalent about living. If the moment passes, they can be saved as they may retain a desire to live. Also, just because someone has attempted to commit suicide, it does not mean that they will remain suicidal forever. In many the suicidal thoughts never return. Everybody who attempts to kill himself or herself is not mentally ill, though some might be. A suicide attempt just indicates deep unhappiness. Suicide also does not happen without warning. Most suicidal people give indications of their intent with words or actions, but the ones closest to them, miss the cue.

Read more.....

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Take care of yourself. (post 29)


Most of us have been raised to 'be nice' to others. We have ingrained it to such an extent that we know no other way. Even when someone puts us down, we second guess and say to ourselves 'Maybe they didn't mean it that way..Maybe I am over-reacting'.

Here's the thing: If you felt bad about something that someone said, what is important is not how they meant it, it is how YOU felt about it.  People make disparaging remarks, out of envy. Sometimes, they are veiled. They are not direct references.

I remember one time when I had made an extra effort to dress up well, to meet a friend. She greeted me and enthused about how stylish I looked. Then in the very next breath, she went on to tell me about how my ear-rings did not match what I wore as a pendant or some such thing. I told her it was my choice, and that was the way I liked it. I closed the topic. Another time, I was telling  another friend, about how I wore only sarees to an International lit fest, as I was representing India. That person immediately made a reference to her friend, who did that at an international conference and someone told her that 'It was too much and she was overdoing it.'   I found that veiled reference  and indirect put-down interesting.
I don't think anyone has the right to comment upon other people's choices! How they dress is upto them.  If you do not approve, you can look the other way.
I detest unsolicited advice on the sartorial or any other  choices that I make.

Comments from close friends are one thing. But when someone you barely know, puts you down, it's time to 'not be nice'. Just walk away.
____________________________________________
Grab my latest: http://preeti.io/a


Tuesday, March 28, 2017

True friends! (post 28)









“I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy. Let's face it, friends make life a lot more fun.”

 

Charles R Swindoll

I met with my good friends Shinie Antony and Vani Mahesh today, both of who are excellent writers. In addtion to being the author of several books, Shinie is also the co-founder of Bangalore literature festival. Vani Mahesh  is an expert on Mythology and she writes mythology. Many of the Amar Chitra Kathas that you read would probably have been authored by her. She si a walking talking encyclopaedia on Puranas and things like that.
They have also co-authored a book, A Kingdom For His Love  which carried a quote by me on the cover!

We  were meeting after a long time, as all of us are immersed in our careers and other things, and we lead very busy lives.
But oh the joy when we met! (as is evident from this picture)
We felt so wonderful, and I feel blessed to have such friendships. (Friendship is a common theme in many of my novels and I feel great to have such good friends)
______________________________________
Buy my latest http://preeti.io/a


I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy. Let's face it, friends make life a lot more fun. Charles R. Swindoll
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/charlesrs121433.html?src=t_friendship
I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy. Let's face it, friends make life a lot more fun. Charles R. Swindoll
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/charlesrs121433.html?src=t_friendship
I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy. Let's face it, friends make life a lot more fun. Charles R. Swindoll
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/topics/topic_friendship.html
I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy. Let's face it, friends make life a lot more fun. Charles R. Swindoll
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/topics/topic_friendship.html

Monday, March 27, 2017

Life's little gifts (post 27)

Each and every day, I have to take my four legged baby for her walks and I have to take her at least twice a day. I have a doberman (Pics in the previous post) and she is an inquisitive explorer.
She goes so fast sniffing everything, and I have to break into a run to keep up with her.

She finds the most peculiar things---discarded banana peels, garden lizards and frogs.
But today she had a lovely little gift for me.
She found a miniature Betty boop!




Betty Boop proudly stands on my desk now.  She was lost, discarded, forgotten by someone. Now she has found a home :)
What can I say? I am grateful for life's little gifts.