Thursday, January 14, 2016

Last post--Visiting my Alma mater--(Blog marathon post 30)


Went to my Alma Mater and got a WONDERFUL welcome. It was fabulous to go back. My session was a national creative writing workshop, which i conducted and it was beautifully received.
Here are some pictures.




In front of my college!

After that I had back to back Press Interviews. I also had an interview with a television channel which is well known in kerala-- Manorama.
Then in the evening I had an event at DC Book house. That went well too! Pics of that, when I get back to bangalore. Painfully slow internet. in my hotel room, from where I am writing this post.

This is the last day of my blog marathon. 30 days have flown so fast!
Will definitely be blogging more often.
A big thank you to all of you who read it and extra special thanks to those who left comments on every post of mine, ever since the blog marathon started. (You know who you are)

Goodnight folks! Keep smiling!
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Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Postcards from Kerala and a medley of thoughts (blog marathon post

So, I left home at 7.30 am this morning and am in Kerala right now. I will be conducting a National creative writing workshop at my alma mater, St.Teresa's college Kochi. The other two writers who have graduated from here are Shinie Antony and Jaishree Mishra, both of who are my seniors from college. I feel proud of this Institution.

Tomorrow evening I will be at DC books, convent Junction at 5.30 pm. Come! or if you have riends in Kochi who would like to attend this event, do pass on the inforomation. On 15th I am giving a talk at Sacred Heart college, Kochi and then i get back to Bangalore. In between, I have press interviews too.

Today, as soon as I got off the plane, I was barraged by messages, which demanded that I turn around an assignment in less than 24 hours. It would require me to read at least 25000 words. No prior intimation was given of this deadline. It was foisted upon me and I was asked if I wasn't aware of it. There was no mail sent earlier informing me of the deadline, nor was I consulted. I agreed to do it out of commitment to what I do. When I do something, I put my heart and soul into it. I am sincere, committed and 100 percent genuine. Anyone who has interacted with me or has been reading me or who has met me would vouch for that. One thing I cannot stand is pretence. The other thing I cannot stand is rudeness. Or a sense of I-am-greater-than-you. I deal with it by mentally distancing myself from it and surrounding myself with positivity.  That's usually the best way.

I went on an amazing 6 island tour today. Kerala is indeed God's own country. If you have read my books, you would know that many of them are set in kerala. I share with you two pictures I clicked today-- two postcards from kerala. With love.



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Tuesday, January 12, 2016

How to be a sexier man(blog marathon post 28)





If you were a  teen or in college,  in the nineties you would be familiar with the catchy number  ‘I am too sexy’ by Right Said Fred, which released in 1991, going on to reach number two in United Kingdom and No.1 on the US charts. The song is sung from the point of view of a narcissistic, bald muscular, male model with hoop earrings and a netted  mesh shirt  who goes on to sing that his personal level of sexiness makes him too sexy for various different things ranging from a shirt to his cat to New York  to Japan.
Another music band The Black Crowes have a song  with really cocky lyrics that  lyrics that go Action speaks louder than words/ And I’m a man of great experience/I know you’ve got another man/But I can love you better than him.
There are many songs where the singers brag about themselves and can’t wait to tell the world how great they are and how everyone else just cannot match up to their prowess.
How presumptuous and boastful is that?
While on screen in music videos such things might be amusing, in real life women would be appalled with a self-obsessed narcissistic guy who is completely into himself and too busy for her. There is a fine line between confidence and being obnoxious. Okay—there is actually a thick fat invisible line, drawn in red --- highlighted, marked, and obvious. Yet many men seem to be oblivious to it. The inherent male competitiveness makes many believe they are a tad more amazing, a tad wiser and a whole lot smarter than they actually are. Scientists say that evolution might have had a part to play in this and it is a trait which is likely to have developed over thousands of years.
Various studies have shown that men are most likely to misread signals from attractive women, perceiving their attention to be more sexual than the women actually intended it. They also tended to think the women were more interested in them than they actually were. Men tend  delude themselves into thinking that a particular woman is into him and he might walk away from a conversation with misconception that he has a chance to have sex with her, where as the woman might have just thought that it was nice, friendly conversation.
Plenty of advertisements, movies and online articles tell us many ways to ‘be macho’ and impress women by being muscular, fit and an alpha-male. Yet, when real women are asked what they find sexy in a man, you are likely to find unconventional and cute answers which veer from what is presumed to be traditionally sexy.
In an online survey, among the lesser known things that women find sexy in a guy were attention to the way they dressed, being kind to animals, reading, respecting waiters, cashiers and other service people, making the bed, helping around the house, being good around children, being kind to someone who is shy and having a good sense of humour with an ability to laugh at himself.
In Mating Intelligence unleashed: The Role of the Mind in Sex, Dating and Love , Robert Provine analysed more than 3000  singles and  found that both men and women considered a sense of humour as sexy. But each gender had different perceptions of what they meant by this phrase. Women tended to prefer men who made them laugh, while men preferred women who laughed at their jokes. Social scientists say that an evolved sense of humour indicates both general and verbal intelligence—a quality much desired for the propagation of the species which is why this plays an important role in mate selection. Side note --A tip to be sexier: Women can boost their attractiveness by laughing a bit more and guys can instantly up their hotness quotient by learning how to make her laugh.
The other day when I returned back from my yoga class, my spouse had cooked breakfast for me. A grilled sandwich and a fried egg, sunny-side up just the way I liked it.  It was too delicious to not click a picture and so I did, posting it on Facebook with the comment ‘All the single ladies on my timeline: please marry a man who cooks. Men who cook are sexy.’  The post got a record number of likes not only from young women but also from young men, with almost all women agreeing that that indeed cooking is one skill that makes a man instantly sexy.
So make her laugh, cook for her, pay her compliments and listen to what she has to say. She will be all yours.
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This piece first appeared in The Financial Chronicle

Ten things you do when when you love someone (blog marathon post 27)



No matter how much you try, no matter how much you want to love somebody else, no matter how much you convince yourself that you have moved on, deep down you know the truth. If you are deliriously happy when you think about someone and a smile creeps up on you, even when you are in the worst of moods, if even a mere thought of that person has a power to send a jolt of energy through your weary body, then it is nothing but love. You can try to squish it, pretend that it does not exist, ignore it, try to make it go away, but it never entirely does.

It always finds a way back.

The above lines are from my book The One You Cannot Have.

Here are ten things you do, when you are truly in love with someone:

1. Talking to them for hours feels like just a few minutes
2. You smile throughout the day, each time you think of them
3. You begin to enjoy songs like this one:

 


4.When they are not around, you keep finding yourself, making references about them when you are in conversation with others.
5. When you eat a meal, you click photos and send them.
6.Same when you dress up well.
7.There's no other sound better than the sound of their laughter.
8. If you are apart, then you stare at them mesmerised on video calls.
9. Wifi and 4G suddenly become more necessary than air when you are apart!
10.You are never ever tired to talk to them or see them.

If you can relate to the above, then congratulations for having discovered love.
If you can't--have patience. Love will find you.
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Buy my book 'It happens for a reason' at a great price
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