Friendships--some stay in our hearts forever

"How do you spell 'love'?" - Piglet
"You don't spell it...you feel it." -  Winnie the Pooh"

"Friendship," said Christopher Robin, "is a very comforting thing to have."
--A.A.Milne

Some of my strongest friendships have broken even though I have given it all I had. One of them was very puzzling. She was like my soul-sister (and you think you outgrow  things like that in college). We used to meet every single day and our children got along so well too. Our children were inseparable and so were we.Then I moved cities and we still kept in touch. We called almost every single day. We laughed, we spoke and the world seemed brighter. She was my strength as I was hers. I remember her once telling me " Preeti--don't you think if we have each other we can face any darn situation in this world?"  I had agreed.

Then one fine day, she vanished from my life. Yes--it was that dramatic. She wouldn't reply to her mails. She would not answer her cell-phone. She had just changed residence and hence I did not have her new landline number.No matter how many times I tried calling there would be just no reply.I must have tried calling , texting at least a 50 times. I must have written at least 18 mails to her. I was worried.I was worried if she was okay.

I had no idea why she was avoiding me. Then I got so worried that I made a friend (who she does not know)  from another town call her. This time she picked up. But the moment the friend  mentioned my name she hung up and never answered her calls either. I made another friend call her and she did the same.(But now I knew that she was okay and well).

To say I was hurt is like saying Niagra is a waterfall. Finally, I stopped trying to get in touch with her. She still had all my numbers and my email and she could easily get in touch if she wanted.

After about three years of not being in touch with her, (by this time I had lost my father and my friend had been very fond of my father too as he had helped her in many ways.)  I contacted her again (on her cell-phone), on her birthday.By this time, my first book had become a national best-seller and I was begining to be recognised for my writing. When I called her, I never expected her to answer the phone as I had tried so many times before (and she wouldnt pick up my call).  But this time, she picked up and I wished her a happy birthday. She couldn't speak for a few minutes and then she burst out crying. Then she kept repeating over and over "Preeti, I do not deserve a friend like you." I kept asking her what had gone wrong and why she had withdrawn. She told me she would tell me everything when we meet. To this day I do not know because when we met, we hugged each other and we were so happy! Whatever had happened in the past did not truly matter anymore.

Now we are very much in touch and it is as though we were never out of touch.

I lost another very close friend due to a silly misunderstanding while I was still trying to cope with all the fame, success and adulation that came with my first book. It was a silly remark which my friend made about my book, which hurt me badly and I expressed it mincing no words. She withdrew in fear because she had never seen that part of my personality in all the years she had known me. I have apologised at least a fifty times. My friend never forgave me. She talks to me now, but very measuredly and not at all like the easy, fun-filled laughter that it used to be. I called her many times. She has not called me even once. Now I stopped calling even though I do miss her deeply. Sometimes, you just have to let go.

If there is true love, then the  friendship is indeed for life. Even animals know that instictively. 

If you do not know the story of Christian the Lion, do watch the video above. I guarantee it will not fail to inspire/move/touch you in some way. The book which has sold millions of copies is amazing too as it has vivid desciption and plenty of photos too).

On the eve of friendship day, I dedicate this post to all my true friends (they know who they are!) --the ones who are there for me, no matter what. I truly value your presence in my life and I am so darn fortunate to have you.

If you (like me) are blessed to have great friends, you're really lucky! Tell them how much you value them. Call them.NOW! :-)

Happy friendship day!

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ps: Two stories I wrote of my very good friendships have been published in 'Chicken soup for the Indian Friends soul' which is now available in all leading bookstores.