Skip to main content

A tale of two sea-horses (blog marathon post 21)


Every Saturday, in the Financial Chronicle, my column Sex and the city appears. To write this I research quite a bit and today I discovered about sea horses. Did you know that in sea horses, it is the males who carry the babies? The females deposit their eggs in the male's pouch and he carries them till they are ready to hatch.

After I wrote my column (I have a deadline of Wednesday.And I am proud to say that I have been writing this column for nearly two years now and I have never missed a deadline) I sat back and imagined a scenario between two sea-horses meeting at a bar, and decided to write a dialogue between them, just for fun and to amuse myself. After I wrote it, I couldn't stop chuckling :)  and so I decided to share it here.


Here's  what I wrote:


Deep down in the pacific ocean,between the coral reefs, two sea-horses meet at the sea-weed bar. She is nursing a blue-algae margarita while he walks up to her. She looks at him and looks away, pretending to be disinterested. She is checking him out with the corner of her eye though. He notices and walks up to her.

‘Wanna come back to my cave? Yay or neigh?’ he says.
She instantly arches up her spine and sits up a bit more straight on the coral reef bar-stool.

‘Excuse me! I have heard far better lines than those.’
But he is not one to be deterred easily.

‘I have a nice tight pouch. And I don’t charge too much,’ he tries again.

Charge? I am not in the market for pouches.Pouches don’t interest me much. Seen too many.’

Her reply is  a bit too quick.

‘Ok, let’s go dancing then? You have a nice tail..was checking it out when you swam in.’

‘Hahahaha. What kind of dance do you do?’

'The horse trot. It’s like the fox trot, but for sea-horses. I’ll teach you. If you’re lucky you may even get to see my pouch later.”

‘I work in the International academy of horse dancing. I would teach YOU.But I don’t think you can afford me, mister. And I don’t wanna see no pouches.’

‘So dance just to dance? I want to practice our mating ritual!’

‘Ummmm...nah, Not interested. I come here to wind down. Dancing is work for me,’
Ms.sea horse starts checking out other horses at the algae bar.

‘What’s your favorite sex position?’

‘Why would I want to tell you that?’

Mr. Sea horse downs his seventh shot.
I LIKE HORSIE STYLE..IT’S LIKE DOGGIE STYLE BUT FOR US.’

Ms.seahorse gets up and bolts.And looks at the bouncer (an orca whale) and gestures to him with her eyes.
Bouncer steps in.

She swims for her life, swishing her cute tail furiously, getting away as fast as she can.

Mr. Seahorse is bewildered. Asks his male friends why he can’t get any tail.
The last I heard he was still asking.

_____________________________________________________________________

If you find it as funny as I did--- despite saying so myself---do leave me a comment.  I take comments instead of cash for making you laugh :) And as an incentive for comments, I pay you back with more such posts!
________________________________________________


Like what you read?
Buy my books, you will love them:   http://is.gd/preetibooks
 Get my latest non-fiction book on relationships at just Rs.175/- : Bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo


Comments

  1. Lovely😊😊had a hearty laugh😊

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha too funny.Recently I saw a video how male sea horse lay eggs
    Was an interesting video

    ReplyDelete
  3. Great fun ............ !

    ReplyDelete
  4. HaHaHa... Rofl... Do research about octopus also, that's also funny...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Will def read :) Thanks! One of my characters in my novels is your namesake

      Delete
  5. haha..wonderful imagery.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Awesome blog :) rofl :)...

    ReplyDelete
  7. hahaha ... good one !!

    ReplyDelete
  8. couldn't stop laughing.. Awesome it is. at every line I was imagining how it would look like. :D :D

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate your leaving a comment! Okay--I appreciate your leaving a comment if you have something nice to say ;-)

Popular posts from this blog

5 not-so-hard ways to lose 2 kilos in a week

The other day a friend and I were talking.
"But how in the world do you maintain your weight? You must be dieting all the time," she said.
I told her I really wasn't and I do indulge in whatever I like to eat. (Puttu Kadalafrom Kerala remains my all time favorite food)

But the one thing I do is that the moment my weight crosses 53.5 or 54 kilos (I am 5' 4" tall. So it's very much on the lower side of 'ideal weight') I step up the exercise and cut down on calories. I have maintained this weight for past many many years. (I did work hard to burn off all the pregnancy weight after having my two children). Many people write to me asking what is my secret. I have written posts about weight-loss in the past. You can read them here and here. (and there are more links in those two posts as well)

Recently, (last 20 days) I managed to lose three kilos (had really indulged in yummy food when I went to Kerala on a vacation)  and since  so many are asking me wha…

Start Fresh!!

As I type this, I can hear the loud music  from the 20,000 watt speakers floating in. A DJ has been hired for the evening, caterers have been arranged and the residents association promises to make it a 'memorable' night. There's all kinds of food on the menu, there are games, stalls and celebrations galore. People are getting ready, wearing their finest clothes, planning to party it up to welcome 2017.

Me? I am staying home. There are years when I have given in to the 'popular thing' which is to party hard, and welcome the new year. But now I know I don't enjoy it. I want to start the new year in a way that has meaning for me.

We have a ritual in my home. We light the lamp at midnight, say a prayer, offer gratitude to the Universe for all the blessings that we have, we wish each other and welcome the new year. The next day, we don't sleep late. My grandparents used to say that whatever you do on the new year sets the trend for the rest of the year. So we …

Why I cannot speak for free at your event.

This post is similar to the semi-rant post that I posted a while back--- Why I cannot read the Stuff you send me.  Once again, I am compelled to write this post, after a long e-mail exchange, between one of the colleges I got invited to and Pranav, who handles all my speaking assignments. I had to get involved as the person was very persistent.


 I am writing this post so that the next time I get a request, I can just send this link and avoid repetitive email exchanges.

I get invites from MANY colleges, throughout the country. The requests are many more than I can handle.

'Ma'am, we are your huge fans..We will display all your books...we will take care of your travel and stay but we don't have a budget for speaker fees.. We must tell you that  X,Y and Z, including Abdul Kalam spoke  at our college and they did not charge any fees .'.  This is the general tone of emails.Many  of the college festivals that invite me  have music concerts and would not hesitate to spend hug…