Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Finding the right woman to marry

Here is the much awaited post!! (scroll down and see previous one) Satish had a great time writing it. :-) Hope you have a great time reading it as well :-)
Cheers
Ps
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Addendum: This post too (like the last) was chosen in 'Top news blog plog posts' and now appears in the home page of Reuters , today. (6th August 2008)!
Really sorry--I have had to remove this post as it will soon appear in a book. Making it available online would have been very unfair to my publisher who has placed so much trust in me. I hope you enjoy the other posts as much as you enjoyed this one. A heartfelt thanks for your support and understanding.Thanks for continuing to read what I write.

73 comments:

  1. Satish,
    *Applause*
    I am starting the hunt, NOW!


    -Nikhil

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  2. Man...I'm gonna take out a print-out of this and carry it with me all the time...this is just the perfect reference any guy "out hunting" could have!!

    Great Post. Well done, Satish!! :)

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  3. Awesome...Will keep all the sermons in my mind as the search is on!!!

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  4. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  5. (men normally lesser) have she fought for this three words or not? If not then she must not have noticed it.

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  6. (men normally lesser) have she fought for this three words or not? If not then she must not have noticed it.

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  7. nice!!!
    but, how do u make ur hubby continue doing these things?? now thats a question!

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  8. Rock on, Satish!!I'm goanna print out this post too... This is goanna be my bible in woman-hunting (not now, I'm 2 years short of the legal age to get married)...

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  9. Fantastic ! :)
    ALL keys listed to a successful relationship ! One of the best posts I have ever come across in a long long time !

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  10. That was a real cool piece of advise Satish...Keeping in mind the fact that you didn't stop with just finding the Miss right...but making sure that Mrs right stay with you for long after ! Thank you.

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  11. lovely.. very nice.. very cute :-) I like what I read :-)
    Hey thank you both of u, very much, for these two posts..

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  12. Good post Satish - I really agree with you on the wavelength and humour and I like the list of 10 steps too.

    Being a guy who likes to simplify things where/when I can, I do one thing (yes, just one) every day and that's to ask myself a question when I wake up. What can I do today to make her happy?

    Now, if a woman has a similar philosophy, the day is off to a good start since we now have two people who are looking at things from a 'giving' perspective as opposed to a 'receiving' one.

    Again, good post - enjoyed the read.

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  13. I really liked what I read and I agree 10000%
    WOW... thanks for posting this Satish and sharing your wisdom!!

    -the other shru

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  14. @nikhil. Thanks. All the best for the hunt.

    @kenny. Thanks. Let me know when it works.

    @prats. Ahem. This was not exactly a sermon, but as long as it helps call it whatever. All the best.

    @jimmy. fight happens when you are not able to convince the other person logically. Guess I am good at convincing. Honestly though she does not miss much - must have just let that one pass since an exception proves the rule and she is the exception.

    @sunshine - advice on things that can be used against you, later on, does not come freely my friend. lol.There are ways and means. PS has managed to hold on to me and ensure I behave - so it works.

    @hari - kal kare so aaj kar... If you start the hunt today you may make the grade 2 years down the line. So start the process off.

    @anant - thanks.

    @ranjit nair - Thanks. One has to provide an end to end solution to the problem right. At least that's what I have been taught in corporate life. :)

    @shruti - Pleasure is entirely ours.

    @huzefa mukadam - Thanks

    @scotty - Completely agree. If both start off on a positive note everyday, it's sunshine and pleasure all day long. Win Win. BTW Lucky her, since you do make the effort to think what would make her happy everyday.

    @the other shruti -Thanks. In all modesty I must admit i thought people would agree to a few %ages here and there. But 10000% - now that goes way above expectations. So what do you agree on. the first part of the gyan or the second part?

    Thanks all for your comments. Have a really hectic two days coming up and hence may not be able to respond to every comment - will try to do so as and when I get some time. So please accept my apologies if there is a delay.
    Cheers.
    Satish

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  15. I would agree more on the second part, I think the first part is quite true also, but it might be slightly different for different people - taking into consideration their personalities and what not! But yes, humor and warmth and wavelength are extremely important!! (doesnt mean that chemistry and being accepted for who you are dont matter! :P)

    However, to make something work, I definitely like the second part, good to know men out there after 13 years of marriage are still like that ;).
    I think showing love is very very important, most people take each other for granted in a few years of being in a relationship, forget marriage!!

    -the other shru

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  16. unbelievable, your post completely captured what a woman wants from her husband. am going to print this in a slightly bigger font and get vinu to read this (well, an ultimatum like read this or no breakfast should do the trick:)

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  17. Well that was indeed insightful, Satish :) You write well.

    PS: Too bad about the MCPs and PMS...or Trolls as they are called!We could do without them!

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  18. Satish, that was very impressive (Taaliyan taaliyan :) ).

    Btw your first five points on Wavelength, Warmth, Good person, Humour & Chemistry were also what drew me to Arjun (my Hubby). So after slightly more than a year of married life, I can say that what you say also holds true for finding the right man.

    And since I was teh first among my friends to get married, and now most of them are getting pressurized by the parents to tie the knot, I tell them one more thing - Don't marry someone just cuz your parents like that person and its the easiest road to travel.

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  19. U really are sweet arent u!!!!! And thoughtful too.

    Except for bringing the bedtea in bed(he doesnt know how to cook) & calls just once or twice a day, my better half(he really is) is all the above & more.

    Thanks for reminding me:-)

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  20. woohooh..great post!!!

    Now I finally know what to search in google!! :-D

    "being able to accept you as you are "..I think that encompasses a whole lot of things since men are generally insecure about that..

    I think what you have written is not a sermon, Its would easily be one of the reference books in the "University of Love and Relationships"!!


    P.S. Satish you forgot to mention woman who wholeheartedly gives away the remote control.;-P

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  21. absolutely loved the post...esp the 2nd half...im so gonna make my hubby read it...though he does most of it...i wish he wud follow pt.1, 3 and 6 more often...

    And i just wanted to add, a good marriage wud make each individual wanna become a better person...Just 2 and half yr in marriage but i can already see a lot of change in both of us... Please keep doing posts like this on marriages.. both point of views that is... ;))

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  22. Wow! Forwarding this to my husband right now. That is pure music to a woman's psyche. Fantastic! Thanks for showing light to all hunters and those who've already hunted but still need improvements:)

    One of the best posts I've read so far - has solid substance, is engaging, nicely scripted, and educative too.

    Why don't you write a book, maybe on Mars & Venus topics. What say?

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  23. I have not read the previous post but I think this one is AWESOME for all those in the "marriage market". Thanks!

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  24. Good advise I am sure will be useful. But given that you are writing on your wife's blog...

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  25. aye aye!! :)

    though i keep saying there is nothing like a perfect person, its more about the RIGHT person for you, i guess your perefct and my right mean just the same here! :)

    brilliant post indeed! esp the must do's AS - afta shaadi! :p

    and at the end of the day when you know you have found that person it makes life just what it was meant to be... a happy place to be in!

    cheers!

    abha

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  26. Nice post Satish - Kudos!

    This is for Preeti, remember 'Brian Weiss' and 'soulmates', I really think you've found one in Satish, ain't that true? :) Can't stop myself frm saying it 'Praise God'(I just don't believe in wood):p

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  27. thnx for the dummies guide, satish :) hm.. I need to work on a lot of things... :)

    i hope PS have a list of 10 things girls should do whn they spot that ideal guy... ;)

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  28. मेरे लिये तो बहुत देर हो चुकी है पर हम दोनो जैसे भी हों, हैं एक दूसरे के लिये आदर्श :-)

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  29. Wonderful post Satish! Its like u researched in plenty. or its ur 13 yrs of marriage..

    I was in this dreamland a couple of yrs back..where-in all the things that u've put into writing (so beautifully!) is wat were in my thots..but here is wat the reality of my life has been...

    Now i must mention..of the 10 rules u've mentioned...My hubby partially fulfills one or two..
    - Calls..calls n gifts..he takes care of em in a crazzy way, not the way tht u've mentioned.Buthe takes care.yes
    - Doin Nutty Things...thts wat hes upto 90% of the time!like telling me I "look so beautiful" while im doing dishes ('coz we had an argument an hour back)..or entertaining my endless need for jewellery by mkg me an awesome necklace with car spare parts (thts the kind i love BTW) etc etc

    He doesnt fulfill the rest really...He doesn't thank or tell me im nice or this or that...But honestly it doesn't matter...coz i know and coz i didn't or don't love him for those reasons...i just like to be with him for the rest of my life n thats wat i think (n hope) he wants as well :)

    Do i fulfill the criteria to be a perfect woman..well ya, at times! but surely not at all times...

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  30. Pavi

    Thanks! No research involved - guess it's just the 13 years of being married which helped.
    And spoken like a true woman. I am sure your hubby fulfils a bit more than just 20%. Good that you realise that you are not married to him for something specific but for what he is - the john cena and ambani bit in the post. lol. Why don't you just ask him if he wants to spend the rest of his life with you or not - am sure it would be a yes, if he fawns over you when you have had a fight. Btw have never seen a necklace of spare car parts - is it a tyre he puts around your neck by any chance?
    Don't know if you fulfil being a perfect woman or not, but rest assured I am definitely not a perfect man - try to be but have some way to go.
    Cheers
    Satish

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  31. @ Unmukt, ershad ershad....

    aadab
    satish

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  32. @the other shru
    I completely agree it works differently for different people. E.g. I was never good at chemistry but managed to catch PS on wavelength. Lol. By the way the 10 things I have given are gyan – have not said I totally follow them myself. If you read the fine print of the article it does have a disclaimer that the author does not blah blah… . Having said that I agree I am cool -). Yep people do take each other for granted and one does need to work on it to make it succeed and that too constantly.
    Cheers
    Satish

    @ ranjini
    Let me run for cover. Vineet will hurl a few stones in my direction shortly. You however have missed a trick in the book. A man can do without breakfast. He could pick up a bite in office. Sleeping on the couch outside, or maybe no dinner or better still,no sex would be a more portent threat:-) Now I will really get hit for letting the cat out.

    @ meira
    Thank you for saying so.

    I totally agree with you. MCP’s and PMS are jobless and should be wished away. Wish there was a magic wand and Poof – there they go :-)

    @smm
    Shukriya. Shukriya. I agree. One should not get married to someone because your parents want you to. However that does not mean you do not check out the option. You never know, you might actually find someone real cool that way and then find the matching characteristics in them. So never miss out on an opportunity but have the guts to say no.

    ps – are you saying Arjun scores 5 out of 5? Have to meet him then.

    @reflections
    You’re telling me!!!!! Totally agree with your comment. In fact sometimes I get diabetes just thinking of myself. Lol. I must remind PS of this aspect off and on.

    I guess the fault of your hubby losing out on one or two aspects rests with you – you have not trained him well enough :-)

    @ Mathew
    Search in google will get redirected to me Mathew. See my comment on cheques and the rest will fall in place.
    Am in discussion currently with Harvard & Oxford to publish my work on this area in line with your suggestion. Soon will be Dr Satish. Or what the heck may just start a university myself. Lol.
    Forget about the remote control boss. In the ideal scenario there may not be a TV itself since you will need time to ensure the 10 things get addressed 24/7.

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  33. What's up with you 10 yrs plus marriage experienced people? I recently read Meetu's blog and she has written a post similar to this.

    Good to see that the seniors are sharing their wisdom with "freshers".

    Tarun

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  34. Satish,

    What you say makes a lot of sense. There is no perfect man or woman. Unless you are poles apart, both have to work together to make union a success. Do I smell little satire also?

    Wish you all the best for Silver, Golden and Diamond anniversaries.

    Take care

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  35. @tarun

    gyan you are aware is always free, whether 10+ years later or as a fresher. Its implementing it which is tough.

    Now don't you start me off now or else you may just get another post shortly. :)

    Cheers
    Satish

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  36. kudos very well written & would love to say that it is thoughtfully written.i think all younger gen must take this seriously it will really help them.
    looks like preethiakka has found a competitor in u {for u have written it better than her}. again i would love to say no wonder preetiakka is in love with u
    leela

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  37. Hi Preeti & Satish,

    your posts were excellent and you have outdone yourselves in putting together all the info on finding and conquering and retaining marital bliss in a nutshell!

    Satish, while I think me and my husband are doing ok as couple after 16 years of marriage, my husband never does even one of the 10 things, sigh! so, as you have already imagined it takes a lot(i mean really lot) of compromising from my part to make things work, i tried talking to him, buying him books on marriage therapy, but given that he's pretty strong-willed, he never let's anyone talk him into anything even if that means reading a book and taking the advice/suggestions of the author or my telling him what I expect of him. What can I do, any suggestions from the great couple I know?

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  38. Let me also tell you what he does! He doesn't have any complaints about me (in other words i'm near perfect?!) Doesn't physically abuse and kill me that's exactly what my dad did to my mom. Has completely given immunity against his not-so-nice relatives, this too unlike my dad, he did everything against my mom joining hands with his evil brother, his brothers' eviler wives. My husband has given me total freedom on whether or not I want to work, my dad made my mom work, made her do 4 abortions against her will, took all her money, jewels and killed her for the death benefits and continued to take the pension the govt gave me till i got married.And my husband wants me to be satisfied because he's nothing like my dad, i know that too. But I didn't choose (for that matter even my mom didn't choose him) this twisted psychotic for my father, did I?

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  39. @Ancy
    Thanks, but don’t be too harsh on your husband. Weekends are something even I have not been too successful on. PS actually wrote a post on this. Just thinking out loud but if Nokia heard some of you woman they probably would come up with a phone which automatically dialed the wife 50 times a day and make revenue out of it.
    Agree that most people change for the better once you get married and especially when kids come. Guess if we kept doing marriage posts like this it would move from his and hers to hiss and hissssss but will sure give it a thought.

    @romila
    Why am I getting this nasty feeling that I may not be number 1 in the men’s popularity list all of a sudden, when people like you start printing out copies and asking husbands to read!!
    Thanks for the compliment but please also remember that by heart I am still from Mars!!
    Regarding the book now don’t start me off on some wild goose chase. I may actually give it a shot and have egg on my face.
    Watch out for the international best seller coming out shortly. :-)
    Seriously though one writer in the family should be good enough I guess.

    @solitaire
    Ha Ha!! Post intended not only for those in the market but also those who have been there and are out of it too. Having said that it does sound like men and women are all like vegetables for sale.
    Thanks, for saying it was nice. 

    @ashish
    My life and writing is an open book. Did not have your password or else would have commented on your blog. Having, said that I charge nominal fees ($2000 only) for writing guest posts on people’s blogs. Let me know when you need me to contribute! :-)

    @mama mia
    RIGHT you are ! ;-)
    Thanks. Yep a happy home is just what the Doctor ordered for everyone.
    Cheers
    Satish

    @Still thinking
    Thanks. Did n’t believe in all that stuff earlier. However PS forced me to read Dr Brian Weiss (the soulmates book). Post that have kind off started to believe a bit, in it. According to PS, my soulmate is my daughter because I worship the ground she walks on. Where I guess Dr BW got it wrong was regarding the number. In my case I seem to have multiple soulmates – 3 to be precise. PS, my daughter and son.:-)

    @ -- xh –
    Consultation is available anytime when required. Including help to get the list of 10 things women spot in the ideal guy. Chargable, of course.
    We all need to work on a number of things so never fear.

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  40. For those of you who have subscribed to comments update via email, apologies if you got the above comment twice.It was written by Satish but I had left it logged in.So he re -submitted from his id, and I deleted it from mine.:-)

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  41. @ Jack
    Thanks. Guess life teaches you a lot most of which is common sense. Unless you are completely mismatched, if both work together it should work out just fine.
    Caught me out on the satire bit din’t you!!!
    Thanks, am looking forward to that too and hoping to make PS’s life miserable as we both grow older. Lol.
    @ Leela
    Ahem, ahem now what do I say to stuff like this. Thanks but in all modesty I must admit that you are wrong. PS is a much better writer than me. In fact I am not a writer at all. She is many thanks I am not which, is why she is my better half. And yes guess that is also the reason why I am in love with her for she is a much better person than I – you know that though!

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  42. It was a great post!!! Your humor is awesome!!

    Cheers :-)

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  43. @ Diamond & amp; pearl
    Thanks for your comment. Was aghast to hear about your Mum. Cannot, imagine anyone behaving that way to another human being, but money is something that corrupts the most sane minds.
    Not sure to be honest if we are qualified to provide advice/suggestions but for what it’s worth and more as a friend I would say as below.
    I am a smoker. I gave it up for 5 whole years in the middle. PS hated my smoking and she had a number of times told me to give it up. However unless that urge comes from within you to give it up it will not happen. When the other person keeps at it, what happens is that you switch off internally and also try and hide it. The day the realisation comes in you just give it up for good.
    I believe that when someone else keeps telling you things are wrong or gives books on marriage therapy etc. then it puts the person off. This will surely backfire since it is like pointing out a fault, which a strong willed person will not find easy to accept. Especially so, if that person is your spouse. I would recommend you do not discuss it in that manner at all. Look at the positive side of things. You have mentioned a number of good things your husband does - he thinks you are perfect, does not complain about you, freedom to work, immunity from relatives etc. Try and work on the relationship from your end and look at the ‘ I before the U’. If you did some of the things like going out of your way to praise him and commend him for the stuff he does reverse psychology may work better and faster. Each of us is built differently and each requires a different string to be pulled for things to work effectively. Not an easy task and not something that will happen overnight. While both have to work on it together in some cases one person may have to put in a larger effort. If you believe the cause is worth it then you should put in that effort. Not sure if this helps but hope it does. All the best!

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  44. Thats a pretty good advice Mr.Sathish...But my love was blind to read all this!!!

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  45. Way to go, Satish~! You've described me perfectly. And I don't think Julian even read this before asking me!!! :)

    You two are a match made in Heaven, a perfect yin/yang thing going on there.

    Thank you for all your wisdom in this post...I shall pass it on and take it to heart.
    For alot of those qualities apply to the guys too.
    xo

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  46. Satish: I don't say don't meet the person, all I say is you also have the option of saying No. Don't get into a marriage only cuz your parents like the guy/ gal.

    As for Arjun, I certainly think he is. next time ur in the capital city, I'l introduce you to my perfect man :)

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  47. This is really amazing satish.

    I am yet to marry, just got engaged few months back so will keep in mind this things to keep my lady happy and to keep momentum in life going on.

    Tejas Lakhani
    www.tejaslakhani.com/blog

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  48. Very nicely written Satish.. and many things are so true... that..don't be bullish at home..save that for the office :-)

    Cheers..
    Shaz

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  49. loved the posts by the two of you. Both of you write very well

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  50. Great post,Satish. Enjoyed reading it :)

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  51. Thanks for your time, I appreciate it! No I haven't been pestering him all the time, it's one of my recent attempts to make things better for all of us more importantly for our 3 kids. Even though he doesn't want me to work, I do work so I can financially support him, I do everything so he can function normally -for instance even though i'm a vegetarian I cook meat because he's a carnivore and the 'immunity' didn't come until recently. I do think about his positive aspects, this is the thought that comes to my mind when I wake up in the morning, 'hey, atleast I am alive!'. But believe me it's difficult do share your entire life with someone who acts as an aloof room-mate. I will continue do what I've always been doing -clinging to the hope that just as my life turned out better than my mom's my girls will have a life better than mine!

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  52. Maar dala Satish :/

    First consider 5 points of yours (and a lot of our own) to find a SUITABLE girl and then follow 10+ points to keep it going smooth

    Aahhhh too much of work.

    But anyway have added your points in my list and seems like this will push my marriage ahead more.

    Thanks for the wonderful post Satish, it is really going to help a lot of people in finding and maintaining a happy match.

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  53. Enjoyed going through both the posts :-)

    www.zaiqa.net

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  54. First of all..congratulations for the inclusion on Reuters home page..I hope everyone out there will buy the book when it's published next month!!!

    Secondly Satish..you have really considered this haven't you?As far as my search for the perfect woman..I was always aware that if I found her, I would not stand a chance, because the perfect woman would never chose to spend even a coughing fit in my presence!.

    Great article...you are both very fortunate to have each other!

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  55. That was fantastic Satish! Perfectly put!!! Kudos...
    Wish the both of you all the very best in life...

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  56. Gee, 55 comments already!
    Well done Satish! I think you have found the perfect partner for you in Preeti (at least, the qualities you mentioned seemed to be describing her).
    I love the nutty things part!

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  57. The best thing about both these posts are their ability to keep both Mills&Boons scenarios and MCP's at bay.

    I've applied the Information-Knowledge-Wisdom model at work, but in issues of personal life, this is the first time I see it.

    Most of us have information and some knowledge about relationshipland, but when both of you speak, its with a rare wisdom. Thanks for sharing the magic.

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  58. Touch wood.Both of you look a perfect made for each other.God Bless
    Most of us go through or handle life,as it comes.not realising if one did it right or wrong.
    But to have analysed it & put it crtstal clear on a piece of paper ,itself is significant achievement !
    Great job Satish & PS !
    Enjoyed both the posts,and sincerely hope those in marriage line & those who are already married and leading life rudderless,take cue from this as a mini Bhagwad gita on handling married life !
    once again Kudos on a great contribution
    TC
    CU

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  59. Hi Satish,
    I am too glad in seeing a very healthy competition among both of u in adoring each other.

    Both of u are lucky in finding the perfect spouse for each other at the right time, when u were both available for taking. So it was the best thing to happen in your life and i am sure it is also the roots for better things happened/to happen in your family life.

    But as you have said yourself, the perfect guy or girl becoming perfect ultimately depends on the resolve to stay together till the end fighting together all adversities that may come in-between. Adversities in life are like monsoon, which may be quite a nuisance when they strike but definitely goes a long way in strengthening the roots of tree that gives the best fruits of life.

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  60. @ karthik S – thank you.

    @ Sri - Love is always blind, but remember in the kingdom of the blind the one eyed is king. Therefore the moto should be to at least be one eyed. Lol.

    @ Julian – Thank you. You are therefore the second perfect woman I know. Guess if I had known you a bit earlier, I would have quoted you instead of Aishwarya. Lol. Thank God for small mercies that Julian did not reveal he had read the book I had written on the Perfect Woman. So he like me seems to be on the road to achieving the perfect man status.
    Seriously though, not sure if the match was made in heaven or not, but there is definitely a lot of effort which is made to make the relationship work, maybe a bit more from her side (given all my faults) and I agree a lot of the qualities apply to Guys too.

    @ SMM – Yes, I know what you mean and agree. The decision should always be yours. But in our society that is not always the case.

    So the next time I am in the Capital will meet up with the perfect man and woman. Look forward to that!!!!.

    @ Tejas Lakhani – Good to be of some help. All the best and a happy married life to you both.

    @ ShaZ – Ha ha. The bullish thing was my addition since I have seen guys behave like that in office and would seriously not recommend that approach at home too. If you have to indeed give someone a hard time let it not be at home but maybe a nutcase of a boss or colleague.

    @ilakshee – Thanks very much. Not as good as PS though! 

    @Balu – Thanks.

    @ Diamond &amp, Pearl – Anytime. Hope things work out well for you. All the best to all of you and keep in touch.

    @ Rohit – Ha ha. Yes, it is a lot of work but the benefits are commensurate. It’s like writing an IT programme. Work initially is painful and boring but output very pleasing.

    You never know, it may actually speed up things since you now know what to focus on. Lol.

    @ Mona – thanks!!

    @Niall – Typical British humour, I must say. Having met Jan she seems to have spent more than just a coughing fit with you.

    Thanks.

    @DyNaMiTe – thank you and wish you too the very best.

    @ Devil Mood – Post your comment it seems to have moved up a bit more, but guess that is not sue to my writing but more due to PS’s popularity.
    Completely agree on her being the perfect partner, though not sure I can say the same from her point of view – working on getting there though!! She really at times gets up to some nutty and weird things and leaves me gaping. Yep, that’s her indeed.

    @ Karan Rajpal – We try and provide an end to end solution to all scenarios. Should start a company I guess.

    Yes I agree and btw I hate mcp’s. Thanks for your comment.

    @ Compassion Unlimitted – Thank you and yes, touch wood.

    I am a little humbled by the comparison to the Bhagwad Gita but in all modesty must say my writing was no way close. It’s just some practical experience coming out. But thank you for saying so.

    @ hari – agree am very lucky to have found PS. But please note I did not leave it to chance. Grabbed her, before she had the chance to say no. Lol.

    Yes, it was one of the best things to happen, the other being getting two wonderful kids. A great family compensates for everything else be it wealth or whatever. Yes one must try to make it work and life is indeed a compromise with both parties needing to work on their aspects.

    You are a poet aren’t you – Whoa, monsoon and all that!!!

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  61. Very nicely written. All guys and girls need to read it. More the guys :D

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  62. good one! ever since i read PS's post i was waiting for this post.

    clarifies a lot of things, IMO

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  63. :)

    loved it...believe in it...and living in it...

    beautiful....

    * standing ovation *

    u cudnt have put it better and thanks for reminding...

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  64. I am extremely pleased with the way Satish has touched the topic .In a love marriage the 5 points are the real contributors to start off with,as they get enough time to understand each other.

    In an arranged one I think only wavelength and chemistry are factors to start with .A lot of hard work is required to tune in to being good and accepting and getting accepted as a good person as also warmth and humor.It is over a time that these things are understood and must be developed.

    The 10 points are extremely important to keep a marriage rolling successfully. All married men ,especially the love marriage ones and those planning to get married,should first read these points and try to follow them, religiously , like the commandments .

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  65. lovely.. :) wish every1 thot d way u do.. u kno wut, i guess its true- if a man appears perfect, rest assured he's already taken too !! :)

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  66. Applause!!!! A Master piece.
    You both are so lucky! :)

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  67. Blows off lot of my preconceived notions about relationships… I better keep all the mentioned points in my mind b4 I commit myself to someone (again..hehe)..:)

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  68. isn't it easy to pay and be done with it?

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  69. @goda ramkumar
    Thanks, but being the male version feel that equality must be maintained – both need to read it equally 
    @tachyosun
    Ha ha. Hope it does not remain only clarifications and it does help…
    @ tys on ice
    Thank you. (bowing now). Ahem ahem what else do I say in all modesty, but thanks.
    @ ajit
    Oops. Did not know this would get equated to commandments or else may have done some more research. But thanks for saying so. Fully agree. Once the initial bonding is established both need to work doubly hard to ensure it works out or else it is tough. A number of our friends have broken off since each one feels that it is not a joint effort and looks at things only from their perspective. Guess there has to be the will to make it work successfully.
    @ nandy
    Ha ha. Now that you tell me, there are a few blemishes here and there, but let’s leave that aside for the time being – immaterial eh?! But the converse is also I guess true. When you find the perfect women she too has been taken – touché!
    @ pranay
    Thanks. Completely agree I am indeed lucky. I do thank god for the good things I have received in life.
    @ vikas kannav
    You seem to have adopted the moto – practice makes perfect. Keep chugging away. Sure you will that someone special one day (and there again maybe every other day).

    @juvvi

    Guess that's your view. Go ahead and pay for it and good luck to you.

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  70. wow!! that was a real long list..
    my hunt though is long over.. and well.. it gets a perfect 10 on ur scale!! :)
    its now a matter of meeting the parents... and tackling the dads!! :(

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  71. I agree ... and not settling for anything less probably explains why I am single - lol :-)
    Great to see someone articulating my thoughts (another way of saying "I see eye-to-eye with you" :-) )
    Browsed around a bit on the blog, guess I will subscribe to it - this also has me curious about the book, will definitely check it out first chance I get (which should take a while as I have an entire rack of books that is on my backlog list :-) - quite unlike me, but I see that happening often nowadays, given my schedule)

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  72. Awesome post! Thank you!

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