On my facebook author page, about a couple of hours back, I asked what you would like me to write about. I had said that I would pick one topic I liked, and that I would blog about it today.
There were more than a hundred suggestions, in this short span of time.
The one I liked most was this request by Aatmanika Ram.
Aatmanika wanted to know how we can deal with negative people who are family or close friends.
Now, when you say negative people, I am presuming you are referring to people who drain you out, who put you down and who make you feel lousy about yourself. After they leave you feel awful.
Am I right?
We ALL have such people in their lives. Sometimes it is not possible to ignore them as you are living with them!
Here are five things you can do:
1. Examine the source: Mostly negativity comes from jealousy. I have someone in my life (whom I cannot avoid) who leaves me feeling drained. When I thought about the things that this person said, I realised it was stemming from deep jealousy. At that moment, I got good insight into their motive--why they were like that. It didn't stop them from making the same barbs and negative comments, but it sure helped me understand where the rot was stemming from.
2. It's not about you , its about them: Often the only way they can make themselves feel better is if they put you down. The most successful people are the ones who build up the others. They are secure in their place in the sun, and they will happily spread smiles and sunshine. But there will always be the gloom-creators. They don't feel good about themselves and you become a target of their negativity.
3. Give yourself a protection shield: Remind yourself about all the good things about you. Give yourself an extra boost of confidence. Use this as as your 'shield' against the negativity. Maintain a gratitude journal where you list all the things that are going well for you. There will always be thorns in life. We need to focus on the flowers.
4. Reward yourself: Reward yourself for putting up with them! Go read a lovely book, watch something that makes you feel good, phone a friend, get a foot rub/ back massage, play with your pet if you are lucky to have one. Reward yourself with something that gives you joy.
5. Praise their positives: I am sure you can find one good quality about even the most negative person in your life. Find that quality and praise them for it. Watch them beam. They probably don't get appreciated and they probably lack love too.
Liked these tips?
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