tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post5659992377442123089..comments2024-03-25T15:49:59.208+05:30Comments on Preeti Shenoy's blog.: Is it a man's world?Preeti Shenoyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01626823872300694608noreply@blogger.comBlogger78125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-38096721076793501972009-07-08T22:37:40.589+05:302009-07-08T22:37:40.589+05:30Great post. Though this topic has been beaten to d...Great post. Though this topic has been beaten to death, unfortunately there is no way to address the issue. <br /><br />We can hope that next generation will learn to respect women and not look at women as sex objects. <br /><br />And, with the way things are working, it comes out as if Indian men are just too horny and may be its true. I had written about this (http://blog.achilles-punks.com/2009/06/are-indian-men-just-too-horny.html)Kannan Karthahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01894052467039030364noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-52090096649010869632009-07-08T19:03:00.888+05:302009-07-08T19:03:00.888+05:30Hi Preeti,
For a decade i have debated this very ...Hi Preeti,<br /><br />For a decade i have debated this very topic. My conclusion today is that it depends on how we define our "World". If this "World" gives significance to people who irritate us with their chauvinism then yes, its a man's world because such chauvinists are aplenty. After wrecking much heart-burn on myself, i finally decided the path i to take and i am sure it will make you smile - <br /><br />http://forevermanasi.blogspot.com/2009/01/female-of-species.html<br /><br />-ManasiMGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02921587956839376240noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-5073128359170651202009-07-08T15:14:28.158+05:302009-07-08T15:14:28.158+05:30wordsndreamz: Completely with you on bringing up c...wordsndreamz: Completely with you on bringing up children right.<br /><br />Satish: You're very right in your observations. :)But what I have said about language being like that is correct too. So i too agree as well as disagree :) Honoured to find you on my humble blog and even humbler comment box ;-) *bows low* ;-)Preeti Shenoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01626823872300694608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-35705755997838026682009-07-08T15:11:43.245+05:302009-07-08T15:11:43.245+05:30Guru: i agree with you on that--there is 'appr...Guru: i agree with you on that--there is 'appreciative ogling' and 'derogatory ogling' :) <br /><br />Meira: Mil to Dil se mila lo :P Win her over with ur charms :) It is possible. :P Ask her how she makes some dishes that her son likes so u can cook that for him :D (Whether u cook or not is a different matter but it will surely win you brownie points) :D<br /><br />Shalini:Thank you :)<br /><br />Maddy: I am not sad or angry :) It was merely a post different from my usual ones. What you have said is very valid. I agree completely. Thank you for a lovely comment.<br /><br />Ajay: :) Thank u. See the carpet in the video.We used to have the exact same carpet.<br /><br />Sunny Raju: Will see :)Preeti Shenoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01626823872300694608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-8254405193572004252009-07-08T14:20:48.277+05:302009-07-08T14:20:48.277+05:30shalini, they sound like a bunch of completely ins...shalini, they sound like a bunch of completely insecure and loser kind of mcps... :)<br /><br />most of the regular guys would have just 'ogled' in a good way! (is there a good way of ogling... yeah i think there is!)Guruprasadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14542501064006901857noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-27752373503871498722009-07-08T14:03:19.332+05:302009-07-08T14:03:19.332+05:30Guru - They are MCPs (mostly) of course! lol..!!! ...Guru - They are MCPs (mostly) of course! lol..!!! :)Pink Mango Treehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09456900186361040730noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-68779984695355541422009-07-08T11:04:34.157+05:302009-07-08T11:04:34.157+05:30shalini, just curious... is it women who normally ...shalini, just curious... is it women who normally pass those comments? or are they usually guys?<br /><br />i wonder... :)Guruprasadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14542501064006901857noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-7269877285576218322009-07-08T09:55:22.760+05:302009-07-08T09:55:22.760+05:30hehe...I do that a lot. And the guys do help out. ...hehe...I do that a lot. And the guys do help out. What irks me is that they have to be asked (yanked from their seats and pushed is more like it :D) while they just sort of expect me to potter around and work. I have promised myself that I'l change that, at least in my household. (though the MIL disagrees. That, ofcourse, is another story altogether:D)Meirahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08615832258916668677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-7196690240403124422009-07-08T09:13:27.300+05:302009-07-08T09:13:27.300+05:30Absolutely Preeti; things might be changing for th...Absolutely Preeti; things might be changing for the good! Yet.. sadly it is a mad mad men’s world! <br /><br />Like I overhear at the lunch table, “Look at HER ATTITUDE, she thinks she is walking along the ramp!” “Wow.. Look at HIS ATTITUDE, he knows how to carry himself!!” <br /><br />Looking forward to more interesting posts like this! <br /><br />Cheers, <br />ShaliniPink Mango Treehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09456900186361040730noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-50186048053650108312009-07-08T02:40:53.394+05:302009-07-08T02:40:53.394+05:30Oh! Quite a discussion here. Here is my 2 cents.
...Oh! Quite a discussion here. Here is my 2 cents.<br /><br />Is it a Man’s world? The answer is YES because it was created, imposed, followed from time immemorial As few people commented here, it is changing for sure, if not rapidly but atleast to an extent. I don’t know if I am correct in saying, our social system or mentality should change, especially in India. From the childhood, we train kids based on their sexes. When a boy cries, he is told “ don’t cry like a girl”, we don’t accept that as an emotion. Likewise when a girl does something a boy normally do, immediately she is told, “ behave like a girl. I would say, engage boys in household chores and whatever a girl child can do ( whatever consider as boys domain) let them be allowed to do. <br /><br />Suppression, overpowering not only happening because Men feels that they are superior. But to an extent women are submissive. In India, we are seeing, reading news that women goes to work and earn for their family whereas men folks drink and enjoy their wives earnings. Abuse of any kind either physical or verbal need not be tolerated at any cost. Of course, immediately one need not jump into conclusion of divorce. But when it is intolerable, if divorce is the solution, then go for it. Be yourself and live peacefully.<br /><br />On one end, I see there are improvement. These days certain men share the responsibility of not only earning but also engaging themselves in household work as well. On the other hand looking at few songs in hindi movies I wonder, Where are we leading to? Is it only because of Men’s world? Are not the actress also responsible for vulgarity? Is it not possible to walk out of the project if their conscience doesn’t permit it? Whom to blame? <br /><br />Also I feel certain section of women misunderstand Empowerment of women, they go overboard and do the same mistakes of what is so called male attitude or behaviour. Wonder why there are conflicts generally in family? Is it not instigated more by women ( MILs and DILs) than men.<br /><br />Preeti, on a positive note, be happy that there are changes happening. There are men accepting not only women’s body but their soul as well. If I rack my brain cells for solution, I could say, from childhood treat boys and girls equally where ever gender should not be a problem. Education and awareness is another key for Women( I am talking about rural area) so that they are atleast independent financially and mentally.<br /><br />Oh! Its become a very long comment. <br /><br />Cheer up lady, its not that bad and there are some positive signsMaddyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13942977619754014724noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-60242895080469389362009-07-08T01:56:38.700+05:302009-07-08T01:56:38.700+05:30Nice new mood video. Trip down memory lane. I alwa...Nice new mood video. Trip down memory lane. I always thought it was a girl who was singing the song - had never seen the video.Ajayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04647172666763982533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-17754758002330911202009-07-08T01:34:35.894+05:302009-07-08T01:34:35.894+05:30Wow, I am amazed by the length and breadth of the ...Wow, I am amazed by the length and breadth of the comments, is it the subject or the experience which has aroused so much interest. well my reply to this post would be<br />http://sunnyrajuspeaks.blogspot.com/2008/03/she-has-come-long-way.htmlSunil Kosuruhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05766155741346268605noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-10860769189177559822009-07-07T23:24:33.776+05:302009-07-07T23:24:33.776+05:30I agree with what you and most of the commentators...I agree with what you and most of the commentators say. Yes, women do seem to get the raw deal. A lot has to do with the way society perceives a woman. The parameters it sets by which a 'good woman' is defined.. Funnily - there are hardly any standards for men.. And as you say, most of the 'bad language' in a male context has a complimentary feel to it.. So entrenched is this attitude that it is even part of our language !<br /><br />And the only way out is for women to be aware of their self worth. Stand up to abuse and for parents tobring up children in a fair way.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-31254145725081052952009-07-07T23:15:24.528+05:302009-07-07T23:15:24.528+05:30Normally I would agree with what the boss says but...Normally I would agree with what the boss says but in this case I agree and disagree. I agree that there are a number of issues as regards men treating women and that things should improve. I disagree that women are not equal -Indira Gandhi was ruling India as the PM and India is considered a male dominated country. <br />In most offices today one has to be extra careful in dealing with a woman since you could have a suit slapped against you and I think comments on cleavage are a thing of the past. Also there are a number of instances where the men slog but a female does not put in as much effort in office and that is condoned. I have also seen a number of instances where females use their charm on a gullible male and go up faster. Then there are others who cannot take pressure when given negative feedback on work and cry. <br />It is therefore difficult to generalise here too and say this is a problem with all women. I think there is a fine balance here and <br />a) if a woman wants to be treated as an equal then it should be earned in the same way as others e.g. effort, intellect and dedication.<br />b) I think it may be unfair to only say the man is possessive. When a man talks to a woman females too get possesive and also there is a second woman involved here too so one cannot blame only the man.<br />c)men too have a lot to improve on.<br />Overall therefore it is an issue and needs to be worked on by both men and women.Satish Shenoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03263056523282998375noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-76545342178946615362009-07-07T21:06:47.023+05:302009-07-07T21:06:47.023+05:30Lostworld: I agree not all men are like that. But ...Lostworld: I agree not all men are like that. But read the comments above. And the cheek to make such a comment (That he is really a father only when a son is born) Disgusting.<br /><br />Meira: of course I know abt pavlovian instincts. Next time you go home from work, you should put up your feet on the centre table and demand that cup of tea, me thinks.<br /><br />Raghu: :-) No apologies needed. Noted. Dor is a wonderful movie.I realy liked it.<br /><br />Wanderlust: Completely with you on bringing up kids right.<br /><br />Kanupriya: Is it really a man's world? i dont think so :P<br /><br />Shades of grey: the thing is why did the woman agree to such a stupidity? She should have been stronger right? Many questions come to my mind too! :) Maybe they were doing some weird sexual game for kicks and she cooked up a story when the detectors went off?<br /><br />Neverending memories: thank you.Preeti Shenoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01626823872300694608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-15473920298271037482009-07-07T17:38:21.951+05:302009-07-07T17:38:21.951+05:30Quite a nice post! Well written. I agree on most a...Quite a nice post! Well written. I agree on most accounts. But I have observed that men do NOT take women for granted like before. I know women who are home-makers, yet their husbands share the house-work too. Ultimately it all depends on the upbringing and outlook towards life. <br /><br />For ex- a married colleague (aged about 35 with 2 kids) passed a frivolous comment when his son was born - 'I am now really a father!!', because his first child was a girl. So we are still a long way from a radical change in men's attitude and society!! <br /><br />I often wonder whether things would've been different if roles were reversed in the olden days. Definitely food for thought and can be debated over for hours. <br /><br />cheers,<br />rohithalostworldhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04911417180097437196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-3043856904043537722009-07-07T17:12:06.776+05:302009-07-07T17:12:06.776+05:30I agree, PS.
I sometimes wonder how this whole ...I agree, PS.<br />I sometimes wonder how this whole 'it being a man's world' came into existence. just because men were the breadearners once? And since we're all so conditioned (have you heard about Pavlov and his dogs?) that we still haven't been able to shake it off. It shows at home too. When awe get back home together from work, I am expected to cook and fix the coffee, while the guys turn on the playstation. It irks.Yes.Meirahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08615832258916668677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-61200325399814532612009-07-07T16:59:40.998+05:302009-07-07T16:59:40.998+05:30Oops ... just realized my comment was almost a pos...Oops ... just realized my comment was almost a post in itself :-) Apologies if the size was rude.Raghuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13137254162870372020noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-51114701935594433282009-07-07T16:44:09.337+05:302009-07-07T16:44:09.337+05:30Very well said, Preethi.
As for those who say wome...Very well said, Preethi.<br />As for those who say women also are to blame courtesy their behaviour, I guess they are missing the whole point. How many women do they think will go after a man if he behaves provocatively?<br />The only way we can change this is the way we bring up our kids, teaching them to respect individuals irrespective of their gender.wanderlusthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00864855488441029322noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-85706121056293420502009-07-07T16:38:39.918+05:302009-07-07T16:38:39.918+05:30Interesting post. Happy you are willing to concede...Interesting post. Happy you are willing to concede exceptions in men :-) I agree that by and large, women live by the rules men have made. Completely agree that language used against women's sexual behavior is unforgiving and highly abusive. Ironically, like you point out, it is rarely derogatory in men's case. But, with due respect, do we <i>really</i> have enough base to be sure men still look at women as their property? I also wonder, how true does it hold the other way round? Would a woman take it easy and alright if she observes an increased presence of another woman in her man's life, emotional or material? Is such insecurity a part of either gender or in the nature of the relationship itself? And once again, about the amount of attention men pay to women's appearance ... agreed most men notice a woman's looks first. No offense meant, but I wonder how many women we come across who do not do it <i>at all</i> . I agree that in general, men are more attracted to good looks. But, how much of it is just because of the way men are? Like Guruprasad pointed out, is there more reason for the thriving beauty industry? I personally do not give too much for looks but is it wrong to be judgmental about looks when we can be judgmental about someone's background, income, & "social status"? Having said that, I agree again with you that there is a thick line between abusing and appreciating. But, in general, aren't women more concerned about their looks than men are? I'm not saying it is silly or wrong by any means. They have every right to their wish without a need for explanation. And, honestly, I think women are gifted with beauty. Like they say, God probably made a man first and then made a woman, proving practice makes perfect, even to a God. But, if we are concerned about what men see in women, doesn't it reinforce the attention paid to their looks? Should the women community itself turn to focusing on other qualities they are gifted with? Should change begin at home first? Imagine a women community that cares more about their individuality, freedom and independent security and gives much less damn about glamor or sex appeal and does it without hypocrisy. Would that be a favor? Would that make it much harder for all those lousy men seeing women as mere sex objects to still treat them that way? I'm not tossing the ball into women's court but like I said, I believe the women community needs a change in itself. Applies to any community that feels exploited (if they do, that is :-) ). The best way to get justice done is probably to help ourselves to every possible extent in putting an end to the crisis. Like Nagesh Kukunoor brings out in his wonderful movie 'Dor', we (yes, including the oppressed brotherhood of men :D) need to learn and snatch our rights back from the society. With an increasing number of women developing an educated outlook, I do not think it sould be too far before we reach a society where women share an esteem equal with men.Raghuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13137254162870372020noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-46948163840239842322009-07-07T16:14:52.668+05:302009-07-07T16:14:52.668+05:30You may have our bodies but you will never have ou...You may have our bodies but you will never have our souls...True & Amen :)<br />very rationale post & hope it will not be a man's world always.Kanupriyahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08277789753188466023noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-30270501842888416002009-07-07T16:10:10.592+05:302009-07-07T16:10:10.592+05:30I agree that it is indeed a Man's World. Do yo...I agree that it is indeed a Man's World. Do you ever wonder that chastity belts way back then were more because a man did not want to father another's child rather than out of actual love for his partner? Of course those days condoms and paternity tests were unheard of and an heir eventually inherits everything. Was shocked to hear about the 2004 chastity belt incident though :O How awful!<br /><br />I feel a hundred other questions surfacing in my mind so I will stop right here. :O)Janehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18151921645987232913noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-70709267037871127962009-07-07T15:04:08.913+05:302009-07-07T15:04:08.913+05:30Well Said post Preeti.. I totally agree with you.....Well Said post Preeti.. I totally agree with you..Kavyahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09484524834065404574noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-19772710178273473722009-07-07T14:22:00.977+05:302009-07-07T14:22:00.977+05:30It's ok! wasn't entirely pointless :) U ma...It's ok! wasn't entirely pointless :) U made a point :P (or maybe i did!) :)Preeti Shenoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01626823872300694608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36418670.post-59392475463464499062009-07-07T14:20:25.262+05:302009-07-07T14:20:25.262+05:30Shantharam: i had already figured it out before u ...Shantharam: i had already figured it out <i>before</i> u told me and changed it too :)<br />Didn't you notice?!!<br />Thanks for the tip though :)Preeti Shenoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01626823872300694608noreply@blogger.com