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5 questions to take you closer to your goals.

Sometimes our families limit us without intending to do so. We grow up with beliefs so strongly embedded that it might be hard to even visualize a different perspective. If it's a family with more than one child, invariably parents end up comparing the two, despite best of intentions, not to. Even in a family with a single child, one may end up 'conforming to a pre-determined role'. (The responsible one, the dare-devil, the singer, the comedian etc).

One child may get labelled 'Performer' and other may get labelled 'Under-achiever'. These labels may not be direct, but as children, we pick up so many unsaid things through so many actions of our parents. The labels may be just  inside our heads, but they stick on, long into adulthood.

The 'under-achiever'  may be really smart. He/she may top the school academically, might have many laurels, and yet deep down may feel inadequate because of early comparisons made at home. We carry our beliefs deep into adulthood, and we don't pause and reflect. We simply live with these. but sometimes a little reflection helps.

Here are five questions to ask yourself, that will need some thinking from your side.

1. What label are you holding on to? Think and reflect.
2. If you did not bother about what your family would say or how they would react what is the one thing you would  want to do?
3.Do you think that your sibling or your dad/mom or any other family member is better than you? In what way? Why?
4. Is above the absolute truth or do you think a neutral observer will have a different opinion?
5. What are you going to do about it?

The Sunflower and Zinnia are two completely  different flowers, that need a large dose of sunlight. Both are beautiful in their own way. If you are a sunflower, do not try and want to be a Zinnia!

Both have their places in the sun.

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  1. I can very well relate to this piece of writing. In-spite of caring and being concerned about my family more than anything else in the world, I still hold this "serious-responsible-black sheep" tag.

    I wish people could see me in a different perspective rather than the tag they have attached me to.
    I wish I could live my life the way I want :) :)

  2. Your posts are very thought provoking , I Wish it would not have ended so soon :-)

  3. In my family of four siblings(3 brothers & 1 sister), I was treated as an intelligent. My elder brother used to get taunted as if he is a dumb and my younger brother was treated as cunning. It might have effected them subconsciously. While I ended up as an Officer in Bank, my elder brother works in a private firm and my younger brother as a manager in a hotel(where one find shady deals).

  4. Timely post, once again!!!

  5. Thanks for this one. I am a single child and, after waiting for long, I decided to go chase my dreams. I waited since I was bothered that mom will be left alone when I am on my own. Then, love shouldn't act as a deterrent for growth in life and living far way from parents doesn't mean you don't love them. What lies in the heart matters the most.
    Cheerz Preeti

  6. awesome and inspiring as always....

  7. A very heart warming post ...just loved it .
    I have this " responsible and serious " word tagged to myself since childhood and if anything happens in my life that deviates the popular belief ....i feel people do over react . And ya , it gets very difficult to live with a stereotyped opinion all our life . But with time I feel things will be fine and we all can live a life we really wish for :)

  8. Beautiful, thought provoking post Preeti. You have a way with words as though you know exactly what's going on in our heads. Keep writing more often:)

  9. HI preety mam, I am huge fan of urs.I am 134 page of "One u cannot have".
    U r my inspiration for some obvious reason like even i am small scale blogger.
    My dream is to become an established writer. Can u help me out in chasing my dream?


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